Practice makes perfect. But what about history? Haven’t we been practicing long enough? What’s really gong on? I feel physically deprived most likely due to the fact my organism is kaputt. Nothing to do with history, though… Still I must find a way to practice. My heart is so heavy right now. It’s never felt like this. My heart is playing back what’s going on in my head. Sonically. I mean what’s going on in my soul. I am the egg in a wok of fried… I am disgusted with the things I say but at least not with the things I do. Unlike the mother’s, sisters, wives.