Dizzying Constitutional Reminds Of Sailing Days


(Un)Fortunately I’m no photographer. But I could attach a toilet bowel better than the guy that built this one. Sorry for the bad pic. Can you make out the lean? I couldn’t figure out how to take this pic (for posterity’s sake) of our forth floor bathroom and the lopsided bowel that someone, somehow, permanently installed. Do you see the left lean yet? From the bowel’s perspective? There wasn’t enough space to take the pic inside the bathroom so I squatted just outside the door way. (Get it?)

“Ever had a constitutional on a lopsided head?”

“Not on dry land, I haven’t.”

Luckily this bathroom won’t be trafficked much as it doesn’t look like we even need the fourth floor of our mega-flat. Still, I did give the bowel a brief sitting (again, for posterity’s sake). It was then I realised for sure that it’s totally unusable for constitutionals. The flush mechanism works fine and the plumbing works good too. It’s just that when you sit it’s almost as though your going for broke on a port healing sailboat. When I asked the apartment manager, slash maintenance guy, if he could straighten things out, he told me that it’s not worth doing because they would have to rip out the whole bathroom marble tiling in order to get to the pipes which would have to be refitted.

Whaaaaaaa? Are you f’n kidding me, dude!

The one advantage I did find with our left healing bowel is that it’s great for man peeing. You know, standing while peeing–the way men were meant to do it. The left lean corresponds well with men who hang right. Just sayin’.

It can’t be said/asked enough: Who builds this krapp?

Welcome to India!

Rant on.