What Is Fascism?

So. Like. I’m sitting in the corner at the mall, a parking lot, a small table in a rainbow coloured sprinkles restaurant and Grasshopper walks up to me and asks: Dude, what is a fascism? (Yes, the question is posed just like that.)

Well, Grasshopper, I respond, it’s like this. Do you remember olden times when people were actually rational about their days and deeds and were extremely concerned about where they stuck their genitals? That’s right, those days are long gone–if they ever existed. But those days–or day–are somehow real, don’t you know. Anywho. In those days something interesting happened to the petty and the perturbed and the ones that would lead to #Trump, post Hitler, Mussolini, etc. The threat that was human existence had gone too far for a few people who run the worlds. But perhaps I’m getting ahead of ourselves.

In the beginning there was talk of communism. Let’s say we’re dealing with the mid 19th century. Karl Marx was the first to actually philosophise about the re-invention of a new & improved feudalism post the French Revolution. The French Revolution, btw, was the first attempt at ridding the world of not just feudalism but really, really useless kings and queens. Back to Marx. Marx’s philosophising, don’t you know, lead a whole bunch of people to question why they had so little after doing so much and few and fewer people had so much after doing so little. And so. A whole bunch of people organised and both pissed-off and scared those few people… a whole lot. In order to counter the many people that were organising, a few of the few and fewer thought about getting organised themselves. The many were the communists and the few and fewer would eventually become the fascists. The fascists would then fight and fight and slaughter the many so that, well, the few and fewer could just keep having more and more. Oh. And let’s not forget. Other than in Russia and France, those f’n fascists saved the rest of those arsehole kings and fcuking queens. Get it? (And enough of the italics.)

So the thing to remember, Grasshopper, is this: There would be no fascism if there were no communism. There would still be feudalism, though. Get it? And if I may just throw this little tangent in there which is perhaps for another worst-post: we would now have Neo-feudalism.

But I die-gress, baby.

In other worst-words, fascism is communisms counter revolution. The thing that holds both communism and fascism together–that makes them cousins, if you will–is authoritarianism. That is, the will of the few over the will of the many–in the most brutal way. And if you don’t like it, I’ll slap you arse, you useless-eating biatch. Get it?

To make things even more complicated, one can also put it like this: Capitalists also found a way to organise so that they could counter Communism, i.e. the revolution that so many were joining back in the day. The Capitalists turned to the privileged classes–from which the middle classes would eventually spring (rentier, neo-feudalism?)–among their ranks who would in-turn turn against the less privileged, i.e. the poor. The privileged classes gladly accepted the Capitalists as determiners of (their) fate as they also laughed and spit on the poor who would be controlled by government bureaucracy, the police state, right-wing media (set free by Ronald Reagan’s fight against the FCC Fairness doctrine), etc. And so. The poor simply became the breeders of more mindless and indoctrinated canon fodder–by the likes of Rush Limbaugh, faux newz, etc. And now you have #Trump. Get it?

Let me be clear about one more thing before I end this worst-post. Nazis are not necessarily fascists. Although Nazis employ fascists tactics (brown shirts, SS, propaganda, etc.), the true fascists that allied forced would defeat in WW2 were Italians and before that Franco’s Spain. I’m not trying to diminish the evils of Nazism here, though. Nazis were (and still are!) just as bad as fascists. But perhaps, when trying to understand the evils that men are capable of, sometimes it might be OK to split hairs. And don’t forget:

The Germans and Italians lost WW2 but the fascists won.

-George Carlin

A fascist is a pig in a man’s suit and who slaps you (or kills you) for disagreeing with him and there is nothing you can do about it because, well, …you love bacon?


More worst-writing on T’s attempt at understanding fascism? Try this or this or this.

Rant on.


Link that better describes Fascism:

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