The Crypto Game Show

Source of pic: Bitcoin logo

Why am I surprised, dear worst-reader? Did I believe that Bitcoin was impenetrable? Did I think that the government or authorities would never crack the kryptonite–that could take down the likes of Bitcoin? Or did I simply think, ultimately, Government doesn’t really care–if there may or may not be some competition? That is, somewhere in the back of my worst-mind, I thought (dreamt?) that because government monopoly on currency could never be broken and only at best dented by crypto-currency, it would just stand by and watch the show go on and on and thereby giggle once or thrice as the masses lose their collective $hit about the value of block-chain generated currency. But guess what, dear worst-reader? Worst-writer be all-kinds of wrong.

According to reports, government crypto authorities (FBI) employed one of three tactics to break into the recent ransomware payments from the Colonial Pipeline attacks that almost crippled gasoline supplies for the entire south east of the united mistakes of #Americant. An act, by-the-buy, that made me laugh my arse off. Not unlike any of the ransomware acts previously perpetrated, worst-writer couldn’t help but perform cartwheels along with exuberant $hits & giggles with these recent perpetrations. Indeed. So is it entertainment for those of us who not only question the idiocy of old money in #Americant but also could give a hoot what happens to that old money? That said and before I get too far off worst-subject, the three tactics employed by crypto authorities (FBI) in order to reign in the simple genius of ransomeware pirates includes the following:

  1. Someone from Darkside snitched and provided access
  2. The criminals were careless which could have given access to emails or other related correspondence
  3. Either Bitcoin or a Bitcoin exchange snitched

Not sure about you, dear worst-reader, but something about this story gets to me. I mean. Don’t get me wrong. I’m glad they recovered something from the ransomware. Heck, over $4m dollars (of very, very old money) was paid out and just over $2m was recovered (which, of course, don’t make it new money. Am I wrong.). Obviously criminal activity like this ain’t right. But if you allow me to put this in a bit of worst-context…

A private company was hacked due to private company negligence. Put another way. Capitalist entities today are one of two things. First, corporations are borderline criminal entities. It’s the only way they can function in the fiction and pseudo-science that is today’s the market place. Corporate taxes, CEO compensation and stock evaluations should be evidence of this. Second, since the demise of the Dotcom boom–which worst-writer considers that last attempt at subverting the return of the robber barons–old capitalist entities, old money, has been struggling to make sure that that sort of thing doesn’t happen again. Reason? The greatest struggle of old money (unearned wealth) is the reversal of all forms of corporate costs–which is what capitalists have been fighting since FDR. In other words, corporations have been given the green light since the so-called Reagan-revolution so that they…

  1. Don’t pay taxes
  2. No longer have to worry about labour or unions interfering with profits
  3. Use stock price, whether inflated or fake (stock buy-backs), to determine the value of the company which also determines management compensation, etc., etc.

So. Again. I could give a hoot if an old-money corporation like Colonial Pipeline (doesn’t the name give worst-reader the creeps) takes one up the poop-shooter because ransomware made one of its privileged and useless employees click on the wrong email link. Again. Whenever I hear about ransomware my arse starts laughing! But that’s neither here nor there.

Capitalism is pretty much, according to worst-writer, upon its nadir. If you’re not in the know, dear worst-reader, just have a visit to my beloved & missed #Americant to see it. The sheer number of #Trump flags making ridiculous claims or conspiracy theories running rampant about how that idiot is gonna be re-instated as prez pee-pee-hair by August 2021 or just look at how much debt people have because gas prices are still at Iraq war levels… Heck! It’s a wonder there aren’t more ransomware attacks. Not that I’m wishing it on anyone, don’t you know. But my arse is puckering up for more laughter. Am I wrong.

Rant on.

-T

Links: https://www.npr.org/2021/06/08/1004223000/how-a-new-team-of-feds-hacked-the-hackers-and-got-colonial-pipelines-bitcoin-bac