Dada Dodo Doodoo

Worst-title #2: Dada-absurdism conspiracy-theory galore?

Worst-title #3: Another Bielefeld Conspiracy?

Here’s a time-stamp link to the YouTube video.

Had a rough night, dear worst-reader. Probably drank the wrong thing–again. You know. Wrong cocktail mixed with a bad vino. Or maybe not. Although I didn’t have a headache when I awoke around two in the A.M., there was an urge to busy myself after which I’d find my way back to deep sleep. Usually I’ll read something or watch an episode from Star Trek (TOC, of course). Or I’ll find a podcast and lay in bed with my ears propped up like a puppy, waiting for something interesting to be heard, at which time I’ll eventually fall asleep again and forget everything I heard anywho.

Something interesting was heard and I didn’t get back to sleep. But before I get to that.

Ever heard of the Bielefeld conspiracy theory, dear worst-reader? From what I understand, it’s one of Germany’s first #Interwebnet conspiracies dating back to the days of Usenet. In short, a couple of Germans came up the idear to mess around with people from the town of Bielefeld thereby making the following claims:

Do you know anybody from Bielefeld
Have you ever been to Bielefeld
Do you know anybody who has ever been to Bielefeld.

That’s it. Pretty funny, eh? I mean. Pretty funny as far as German humour goes. The idear is that the town of Bielefeld is a government/alien/blah-blah fictional town for the purpose of… I don’t know what the purpose is. Then again, I’ve been expatriated in Germany for well over thirty years and I still can’t laugh about the Bielefeld conspiracy. Is that because I’ve been to Bielefeld? Or that I’m an alien (which I technically am)? Not sure. But I suppose that’s neither here nor there. So let’s move on with more pertinent conspiracy-theories, shall we.

Although I’ve been sporadically following BirdsArentReal for a while, it’s never crossed my radar as something that needs deeper thought or consideration. It’s more performance artistry, don’t you know. I mean. It’s yet another fairly straightforward conspiracy theory that continues the intertwining of simple minds. Yet there is something different about this one. Or is there? Unfortunately the interview I heard last night with the creator of BirdsArentReal is proving that he’s not quite ready for prime-time performance artistry. With that in worst-mind, what is this guys schtick? Well. It goes something like this. A young man has found meaning in his life–in a world that is forevermore meaningless. It is a meaning that contains a narrative. A very entertaining narrative. Does it matter that this narrative is a bit farfetched–in a world of conspiracy-theory farfetched-ism? Of course not. So let’s move on.

When I first heard about birdsarentreal sometime late last year, I loved the idear. What a gob smack of creativity, I thought. For me it reeked of anti-establishment behaviourism albeit from the left. For you see, dear worst-reader, the conspiracy-theory goes something like this. Birds are not real. Instead birds are government made drones. For. Don’t you know, dear worst-reader. The reason birds sit on power lines is because that is how they recharge their batteries. Or didn’t you know that? Batteries that drive the motors that enable them to fly. Right? They sit on telephone lines, btw, because that is how they transmit the data they have collected about us and send that data to the government. You getting all this, dear worst-reader? Amused yet?

The thing is, dear worst-reader, in order to maintain this sort of bat$hittery, aka conspiracy-theory krapp galore, there has to be a way to maintain the/a narrative. The best way to maintain a narrative is to get lots of people to believe in the conspiracy theory and to buy the t-shirts and baseball hats and hoodies and get lots of people talking (about you). In other worst-words, there has to be a social-political-economy behind the whole schtick. Hence, my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant, like so many other countries, is awash in conspiracy-theory bat$hit galore. And now the bat$hit galore has a new generation taking hold. Look what they’ve come up with, eh.

Hail conspiracy-theory anew, baby.

In order for conspiracy theory to thrive a few things have to come together–according to worst-writer. The first is the gullible. The second is no way out. The third is the narrative. I’m sure there is a lot of other stuff that hold conspiracy-theories together but that ain’t what worstwriter.com is about. For that apply your #interwebnets activity as you see fit. Anywho.

If you have a look at the video/interview linked to in this post, the kid that started this new-fangled conspiracy-theory bat$hit is struggling to maintain his narrative. And we all know what happens when certain types of people get too much attention for things they may or may not have expected. As far as I can tell, based on the video/interview, this kid is losing touch with all the stuff that makes this bat$hit thrive and all the stuff that made his narrative entertaining. But I’ll let anyone interested in that worst-theory be their own judge about that.

So what is the point of this new-fangled conspiracy theory? My initial guess was thus: $hit on #okboomers and all those who’ve f’d the future of Gen-Xers. For don’t you know, dear worst-reader, I sympathise with Peter McIndoe. He’s the same age as my son. And even though I’m a late #okboomer, I certainly do not share the mindset that has lead to the times we are all forced to live in now, which is obviously stealing life away from Gen-Xers. You know. Capitalism run amok where it only serves the old (old money). War. War. War. And let’s not forget this/a new way of life that is FREEDOM TO BE STUPID that has lead to the advent of former prez pee-pee-hair, #MAGA and #Americant.

I’m starting to feel bad for this McIndoe. His conspiracy show, which, btw, is traveling across the US, not unlike barber surgeons of yore, might lose its momentum though. Reason? Well. Even though McIndoe is a pretty good narrator (of is conspiracy-theory), there is one key element that he seems unlikely to maintain based on how he interacted with this particular podcaster. In short, there is the adage that goes something like this: don’t shit where you eat. In other worst-words: if he wants to be so defensive and combative he should do so on platforms that his conspiracy-theory narrative espouses to bat$hit upon. The fact that he tries to label The Majority Report and Sam Seder the media is simply preposterous, if not blatantly ignorant. But on that note I should die-gress.

The gullible. No way out. Narrative.

Conspiracy theorists have to be combative. And that’s cool. Being defensive ain’t the worst to end all either. But this kid, by attacking a left-wing podcaster, who I’m sure up to the point of this interview was also very entertained, might be pushing his bat$hit-show in the wrong direction. As I worst-noted, of the three things required to maintain the social-political-economy of conspiracy-theory, you got to have three things working for you. Of those three things, you might be able to lose one of them but you can’t lose all three. Hence the gullible, no way out and the narrative are easily maintainable when it comes to moon landings. I mean. How many people are privileged enough to prove things otherwise? On the other hand. Being unable to maintain these three things might be the reason Alex Jones is facing financial ruin because his conspiracy theory about Sandy Hook being a government hoax is beyond evil.

Ok. I might be off subject a bit–or confused. But hear me out a worst-sec or two more.

It’s unfortunate that I was once entertained by BirdsArentReal and now I’m pretty much sick of it. Such a short-lived fun bat$hit show, eh. Then again, is there something more to not only a Gen-Xers anger regarding his life being ruined by old people, greed-mongers and politics-of-bat$hit? Of course there is. Peter McIndoe should pick his enemies better if/when he comes up with a new & improved meme that may or may not make him a buck. For. Don’t you know. Dear worst-reader. I was on the verge of buying one of his t-shirts. But now. No. He’s just too friggin mean & stupid. So let’s all just keep laughing at what got BirdsArentReal going–the whole thing about birds charging on power lines–and forget about this kids almost psychotic way of handling interviews with rational thinking people.

Rant on.

-T

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