He Said His Name. Oh My. Oh Why?

REMARKS BY PRESIDENT BIDEN ON THE CONTINUED BATTLE FOR THE SOUL OF THE NATION – The White House

REMARKS BY PRESIDENT BIDEN ON THE CONTINUED BATTLE FOR THE SOUL OF THE NATION – The White House

Above a link to transcript of Biden’s speech yesterday.

Gotta hand it to prez Biden. He kinda nailed it in this speech. In fact, for a guy that’s spent pretty much his life in politics, including his speech impediment, this is almost a great speech. Then again, who is it for? Remember. One side of #Americant politics is hellbent on bringing down the other (side). Or is the current state of things about just bringing down Democrats, Liberals, hippies, those who have learned in life to think for themselves? At the least, considering the state of make-america-stupider, it doesn’t look like the other side will see the light of its way anytime soon. Oh well. I guess it’s no wonder that worst-writer, even though I voted for Biden, still can’t come around to just liking him. But this speech does help. Which brings me to this worst-question: in a country where things need to change quickly, and there’s no real chance of that happening, what else does one turn to? I mean is there something or someplace or some country, some ideology, politics, etc. out there in the world that’s offering an alternative? My beloved & missed #Americant may be a rather ugly beacon right now, but it is, considering everything else in this worst-world, the only beacon.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

How Not To Go SUV

Big changes, dear worst-reader. Hence lack of summer worst-posts. The deal? Well, it goes something like this. My better-half and I have been battling with the idear of mobility in our lives for the last ten or so years. We bagged the two car household about six years ago. Subsequently we went full-on ebike w/ the funds from the reduction. The only time we need a vehicle is with really bad weather (and I mean really bad weather) or the occasional road trip. For the last few years we’ve been seriously considering getting an electric car. Driving range of todays cars is more than adequate for our needs. The big hurdle with the e-car, though, for us, is the charging. Reason? Since we are renters (of a really cool little townhouse) we would have to rely on the property management company to deliver at least part of the charging capability. They made it clear that the cost of rigging the property (with a half decent charging connection) would fall 100% on us. There are two other electric cars in our parking garage and neither of them charge their vehicles there. The expense has something to do with the property’s electric grid, which has to be altered to provide electric car charging. So they ingloriously claim. ;-(

As winter was winding down this year, the wife asked me for the umpteenth time, especially considering that Covid had made it extra popular, if we could rent a mobile camper and do the camping thing. She was getting desperate for a vacation. I told her, as I always have, I’m not ready to join the Spießer (petty bourgeois) camping community. My Spießer comment didn’t go over well. It was then I tried to add a vacation solution. So I performed some husbandry…

Come on, baby. Let’s wait another half year. Covid ain’t gonna last forever. Don’t look at me like that, baby. Listen. How bout this. We haven’t been on a decent vacation in what? Two years? I know. It’s tough. But. That means we got plenty of funds for a nice stay in Bali or Thailand or maybe South Africa. What do you think, baby? Come on. Don’t make me hang around all them old people and their smelly, gritty campsites.

She wouldn’t let it go. She always wanted to go camping—so she claimed with those… eyes. Really, I thought to myself. I never got that impression before that she was a Spießer—I mean camping fan. Are there other surprises awaiting this—going on twenty year—relationship? Oh my.

Long worst-post-short. During some after dinner marital discourse with her filling my wine glass more than usual, I told her about the time I spent a weekend in a T1 VW camping bus just outside of San Diego, CA. It must have been thirty or more years ago. What a blast that was, eh. Of course. I left out the part about the the beautiful Danish chick I was with who turned out to be a ravenous succubus who wouldn’t leave it alone even when I was trying to sleep or get out of Nordic-driven commitment hell… But enough of worst-writer’s search for (the meaning of) love.

A few days after our nice evening of marital discourse—and I having nightmares of too many succubus experiences—she came home with a brochure from a camper rental company. On the cover of the brochure was a new VW Camper, dressed in full glory camping kit, with cute little stickers all over it that reminded one, with any imagination, of the hippy bus of yore. Between some great marital discourse and the cool-factor of VW still making this Bulli after fifty friggin years… yea. She won.

We spent three weeks in the rental Bulli driving and camping along the Baltic coast and had a blast. Not only that, this frickin VW drives like a dream. It reminds of an early 80s Cadillac that I drove back in the day. Ever driven a Cadillac, dear worst-reader? They’re dream-boats, baby. But the real magic of this vehicle, ultimately, is the fact that it’s just a car. Sure. It’s a big car. It can sleep four. It has a sink with running water, a two-burner gas stove and a fridge. Heck, it even has a shower in the rear. Toilet? We had to buy that extra and it’s small enough to fit under the sink. All that and its height is what makes it not quite a car. And it still fits in our garage. And when the time comes it’ll also fit through all those little towns and villages that we’re gonna visit in France, Spain, Italy or Greece.

In worst-closing. We were so enamored with this Wunder-Wagen that after fulfilling the wife’s camper dream we immediately started looking around to buy one. To hell with ideological worst-wishes of environmentally friendly e-cars—give or take the few caveats regarding how environmentally friendly they really are. Instead. Our quest to be car-less has become a discovery of utility. Leisure utility, baby. As worst-luck would have it, even though orders for this thing are backed up for up to eighteen months, we found a dealer that had this one in “pure grey” that he was using as his dealer car. Although it was used for test drives, it was mostly driven by employees.

Our Bulli is a 2022 model, front wheel drive, 150hp and gadgets and do-dads till the cows come running. The pop-up roof is electric and the upper bed is one of the best I’ve ever slept on. The mattress has these funky rubber plates that work like springs. Even though you can feel the plates through the relatively thin mattress, it feels like you’re sleeping on a thousand baby hands. We had to wait six weeks —after committing by contract to purchase it—for delivery. And get this. We also had to sign a whole bunch of contract amendments because we are, technically, buying a used commercial vehicle. The thing that stressed me the most was the fact, when we test drove it, it had just over eleven thousand kilometers. We had to sign—and pay for it—and allow the dealer to put up to 5000 more kilometers on it. WTF!

When we finally did take delivery and the salesman could see the stress from the veins popping out of my bald angry forehead, he showed me, of the six weeks we had to wait, it was only driven for three where they put a thousand kilometers on it and not five thousand. The other three weeks were due to the delays in Covid having pretty much brought German car registration bureaucracy to a stand still. My blood pressure began to subside and I managed to get on my knees and thank Germany, VW, and the universe for allowing me make such a purchase. Slap. Thank you mother, may I have another.

So buckle up worst-campers. More to come.

Rant on.

-T

Divine Inspiration Jaw Drop

It’s true, dear worst-reader. My jaw dropped lower than ever before this morning. And don’t you know, dear worst-reader, while enjoying my morning tea and scanning the newz I happened across a vid where an old white dude from misplaced white-country Arizona USA declared… Wait for it. Long Pause.

Ok. Before I get to the jaw-dropping moment allow worst-moi to explain something about one of the foundational pillars upon which my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant rests. That pillar is religion. Two of the other pillars, of course, are money and war. Now. Don’t get me wrong. As far as religion is concerned, to each his own–as the saying goes. I’m ok with religion. (Obviously I have more problems with war & money. But that’s another worst-post.) The thing is. I got no problem with religion as long as it’s kept in your church or in your bedroom. Bring it out in the open and make it part of public life…. Hold on there, sport. That’s when I jump ship. In fact, dear worst-reader, religion and religious dogma is one of the motivators for my expatriation from my beloved & missed #Americant. With that in worst-mind, I should disclose, I jumped ship for #Eurowasteland. Nothing else need be worst-said about the perversions and horrors that is the history of #Eurowasteland religion. On the other hand, in these modern times, obviously due to recent history, religion has taken a back seat in the fail-upward vehicle that is #Eurowasteland. But before I get off worst-subject.

It is a tenant of my faith that the Constitution is divinely inspired.

-Rusty Bowers, speaker of Arizona’s House of Representatives, June 21, 2022

In the vid linked above the jaw-dropping moment occurs at around 9:45. I cannot believe what this man is saying. I’ve replayed it numerous times since. In the meantime, moving my dropped jaw out of the way in order to activate my iPad, putting it in hyper-turbo research mode, I tracked down a transcript of this video. And I kept reading it, dear worst-reader. Even as I worst-write these words, the space between my heart and mind rumbles. Jack-hammer rumble, baby.

But why, worst-writer?

Well. Thanks for the inquiry, dear worst-reader.

The thing is, as blatant as religious indoctrination can be, it’s sometimes difficult to show the dogma machine at work, where it can be measured, where its physical presence can be witnessed. Obviously, considering the religious propensities of #Americant over the (insert your number here) years, there are other examples of how things have gotten out of hand. Just give a listen to so-called religious institutions in #Americant and where religion has seeded itself in both public and private life. They have radio, TV, mega-churches, prayer breakfasts, required prayer in schools and let’s not forget that whole In God We Trust printed on the almighty dollar. But to hear dogma in physical form, to see it’s mouth move, it’s old, dry skinned head, old dry blemishes included, manifest within the confines of what could or should be the greatest human experiment in history at the behest of f’n ENLIGHTENMENT–within the walls of so-called Democracy, freedom, etc.–is shocking. Or am I the only one to see through this man’s false, if not misguided, humanity?

It is a tenant of my faith that the Constitution is divinely inspired.

WTF!!!!

As far as my reading of history goes, dear worst-reader, the founding fathers of #Americant wrote the Constitution in-spite of religion. At the time, of course, it was difficult if not impossible to be an atheist and thereby serve in both public and private life–with any success. Ain’t that why the likes of Thomas Jefferson & Co labeled themselves Deists? Indeed. But here we are, dear worst-reader.

Afeared yet?

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Meaninglessness Meaning Mean

How bout the weather in #Eurowasteland these days, dear worst-reader? Yesterday D’dorf hit 36°c (96°f). For a place where air conditioning is only available in your car, that’s pretty friggin hot. For the past two days we have had all the windows closed, the shades drawn and we’ve taken great care not to leave any terrace or patio doors open so as to not let in the heat. Or is it not let out the cold remaining in our flat from a long and wet winter? #Nomatter. Although it’s a task to keep our flat cool for the whole of summer, we need to do all we can to hinder that such an early heatwave doesn’t extend the inevitable. The way this summer is going, I’m sure by the end of June or early July there will be nothing we can do to prevent things from heating up. With that in worst-mind, I actually took a sun-bath nap in the late afternoon yesterday and when I woke my sun-lounge was drenched with sweat. Did I achieve the right amount of tan-line that my better-half digs? Maybe. Then again, after spending the last three weeks in the cold and rain of the Baltic coast, a bit of über-sun felt pretty good even though it was the hottest June day ever in some parts of Germany. Plus. It gave me a chance to catch up on some reading. With that in worst-mind…

How is it that some think there is a new kind of right-wing in my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant? Or did you not know that Republicans, in contrast to Democrats, need a new thing every now and then? According to the Vanity Fair article that motivated this post, there is whole bunch of unsung diversity among Republicans. But before I worst-get to that. It’s not enough that the right-wing of my beloved & missed #Americant, especially the bat$hit right-wing of the Republican Party (for there is certainly a right-wing of the Democratic Party–but that doesn’t mean I’m a bothsiderist), has found ways to branch out, diversify, interject new and bold idears, it’s mostly about how they are shameless in doing it. As much as it hurts to admit, I’ve admired Republicans because of this for a while now. Whether it’s the bat$hit of Alex Jones, the man-child, trustxfund baby whining of Tucker Carlson or the buffoonery of thumb in arse to thumb in mouth that is #Trump, Republicans sure do know how to mix things up. The thing that entertains worst-moi about it all, though, is how much I laugh and giggle and cackle watching #Americants eat it all up while #Trumpist wave smelly fingers in front of their faces. Hee-haw, baby.

The worst-thing is, dear worst-reader, the Democratic Party, as middle of the road as it has become in the past (insert your number here) years, can’t seem to shake the stigma of nomenclature stuck somewhere between 1950 and the fall of the Berlin Wall. You know, the nomenclature that is communist, socialist, marxist, liberal, hippy, etc. I mean. Other than a few & far between lingerers that manage to traverse (or is intersect) political ideology, all the Democrats have is an Independent, Bernie Sanders, a feminists, Hillary, and a youthful and gorgeous millennial, AOC, who is from, of all places, Brooklyn. Wait. They are the only source of anything blue in the country, right? #Nomatter. My point is, Dems have no diversity–politically speaking. Wait. What about Antifa, you ask. Well. No. That ain’t it. Antifa is a right-wing thing, don’t you know. At the least, it’s part of the right-wing cartoon. At the least-least, Democrats should have embraced antifa. Instead they let faux-newz control its meaning changing if from being short for Anti-Fascist to being… whatever. Or do you really believe that some Democrats are fascist insurgents or proto-fascist enablers that want to take your guns away, force government paid abortions that will coincide with government paid contraception, prosecute you for yelling FIRE in a crowded theatre and don’t forget about all the porn that is gonna stream for free to pizza parlours where children are groomed for sexual slavery in basements while hooligan evangelists crush the paws of puppies. The cartoon working for you yet, dear worst-reader?

And now for a short worst-reality check. Considering that it was with a Democratic president (Clinton) that my beloved & missed #Americant enabled/facilitated its greatest post WW2 economic boom (Dotcom) and there hasn’t been anything like it since, Democrats are now the communists? Wow. That’s why it must be a struggle for Dems to do what Repubs do. Indeed. The Republican side knows how not only to get it’s mojo on but how to keep it on–viagra style, baby. So let’s worst-run down the list again: the tea-party, Neo-cons, Reaganites, #MAGA, Q-Anon and what I like to refer to as the brown-shirts aka The Proud Boys and Oath Keepers. Again. Wow. So much excitement on the right side of things.

The problem is, dear worst-reader, it’s not enough for political conservatism to have more political diversity in its ranks. It’s more about the idear that there always needs to be something more, something new, differentiators galore. Like a junky and his next hit or that same junky finding a better hit (fentanyl), it’s all about the hit. Conservatives have to push on and on and on because they can never see the one-way highway that is their only way. It’s almost as though, unlike liberal minded peoples, who IMHO are enlightened about the world, conservatives lust for illiberalism because it is the spark in their dried up forest they know they can always rely on in a pinch. A/The pinch that will save their arses when/if/as the world comes to an end because, well, illiberal peoples the world over are usually not smart enough to work or manage their way out of a problem–but instead rely on coercion and violence and authority–to just burn it all down instead of admitting to so much un-enlightenment. The saddest part is liberals don’t have time to care. Reason? I’m not quite sure. Is it passivity? Too many generations of leisure? Weed? How political conservatism has murdered culture just like it decimated the countries manufacturing base? I don’t know. More worst-thought on that perhaps in a later worst-post.

Right-wingers are easy prey to the whims and idiosyncrasies of reactionary politics, particularly when politics are cartoonish. Conservatism breeds anti-intellectualism, anti-science, religious dogma, the want of a saviour, but also a former president that spends more time in the morning on his hair than he does learning about the world, etc. That’s not to say that The Left doesn’t have diversity. It’s just that, for worst-writer, labels like Antifa, which, to my surprise has its own wiki post associating it with the U.S., or Socialists like Bernie and AOC, simply can’t play the cartoon game. First. Enlightened peoples (Liberals) can see through the bull$hit of the one-way highway that is The Right. This was best exemplified when former prez pee-pee-hair commented after Charlottesville there were fine people on both sides. WTF? But there’s one new thing right-wingers have up their sleeve that not many people are concerned about. But should be.

In the end, baby, it’s all about the money.

As mentioned above, right-wingers have the tea-party, Q-Anon, #MAGA, etc. These people are the minions. Dems have Hillary and, perhaps, Hunter Biden’s laptop (or is it Benghazi)? This is cartoonish media fodder. #Nomatter. But there’s now something else right-wingers can pull out of their cartoon hat and thereby maintain control of the spark and their dried-up, old white man forest. Some call them Libertarians. Neo-liberals might also be a/their buzzword. In any case, these are people, according to the article below, that somehow claim, rationalise, that their beliefs (ideology) transcends both sides of the #Americant political spectrum which may or may not make them neutral or, at best, not radical. How ingenious of them, eh? But all worst-sarcasm aside.

The author of the article, who I’m guessing is liberal, does a pretty good job of wadding in the shark waters of pseudo-republicans so he can get an interview. You know. He buttons-up for the money-mongers of both new-republicans waiting in the wings for the old republicans to all die-off and the money grubbers hell-bent on making sure that nothing as banal as government bureaucracy or legislation can get in the way of their über-selfish interests, e.g. Peter Thiel. Although worst-writer is aware of the likes of Peter Thiel and JD Vance, I would have appreciated a bit more brass-balls when writing about these people. Peter Thiel is an ideological horror show with a huge bank account. A bank account he is willing to open up to those who like his horror. Vance is the same but he’s dependent on Thiel because he is a politician–or the author of a very weird book. The main problem with Neo-liberals and/or libertarians, dear worst-reader, is simple. These are in essence bat$hit Republicans without (brass) balls. They will always be dependent on the past never thinking about the future. Well, at least they will never think about a future that doesn’t include money grubbing. Although they believe that they have better idears than the old guard, in essence, they are young $hit-flies regurgitating on the ancient dungheap at the foot of a dried up forest. Indeed. Unlike old Republicans who are the spark holders, these younger, money-grubbing Libertarians, having polished-up their right-wing jargon, and will do nothing to stop what is obviously the coming end of the perpetual state of slow-crash into a smoldering rotten forest that is my beloved & missed #Americant.
Good luck suckers.
Rant on, baby.
-T

Link:
https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2022/04/inside-the-new-right-where-peter-thiel-is-placing-his-biggest-bets

He Who Should Not Be Named

Pseudo-Review of The Premonition and The Fifth Risk by Michael Lewis

It was hard to imagine anyone wading into that passage voluntarily, much less giving it a second thought. The words mattered less for what they said than for what they could be made to say. Like the words in the Holy Bible or the U.S. Constitution, they invited the problem of how they might be interpreted, and by whom, and for what purposes. -Michael Lewis, The Premonition: A Pandemic Story

Just finished reading two Michael Lewis books back to back. And boy did I eat them up, dear worst-reader. The thing is, Lewis has an incredible knack for story telling even though his subject matter is far from fictional.

In The Premonition Lewis chronicles not only the covid-19 pandemic but also covers in great detail SARS, or severe acute respiratory syndrome, which we’ve been battling for the past few decades in one form or the other. He also compares our current response to the 1918 influenza pandemic and how times may or may not have changed very much. The crux of this book, though, is how Lewis details the lives of those working in the wings of not only pandemic control but pandemic prevention and/or mitigation–and he only mentions Dr. Fauci a few times. Without being too science-see or getting bogged down in details, Lewis provides clarity in how Covid may or mayn’t have been better controlled. Indeed. With a lot less politics and more faith and trust in the science, things could have been different.

The Fifth Risk was written a few years before The Premonition. Having read the latter first, it is clear that both books are related. In The Fifth Risk Lewis indirectly and with masterful subtlety chronicles the election of former prez pee-pee-hair, including the buffoonery that coincides with his election. Instead of focusing on he who should not be named, Lewis writes about the ramifications of not just an inept, privileged man-child that glows like a cheeto-jezus winning the electoral college–and losing the popular vote bigly–but how that man plans to dismantle the U.S. government by systematically installing inept cronies whose only achievement in life is to admire the dear-leader or the wealth of others and thereby wear a badge of STUPID as though they’d just won an Olympic gold medal in a sport they’ve never heard of.

Ignorance allows people to disregard the consequences of their actions. -Michael Lewis, The Fifth Risk

What’s important about these books is how Lewis tells the story of American scientists, civil servants, government employees, etc. All these people deserve praise and admiration which they obviously never get–especially in these times/days of government and political fail-upwardness. It’s certainly better than telling the story of how a moron like former prez piss-hair could fail his way to the highest office of THE LAND OF FREEDOM TO BE STUPID. What a boring story that would be, eh?

Brilliant.

Rant and read on, baby.

-T

North Sea Oysters And Glamping

Pseudo-Review of the T6 California Edition VW Bulli

Well. There you have it, dear worst-reader. I finally did it. Although it’s not a notch on (my) bucket list (on account I don’t have the privilege and inner-banality of a bucket list), I finally took the plunge and cruised around in a (modern) hippie van souped-up as a modern day Glamper. And what a Glamper it is. With that in worst-mind, let’s have a quick review of the VW Bulli T6.

First. My better-half and I spent three weeks driving around the German, Polish and Danish baltic coast starting with a short stint in Berlin and then to upper Usedom. From there we went to Rügen, Rømø and ended it all in Sylt where I ate some of the best oysters ever. Our camp grounds of choice were either on the Baltic Sea or any of the various and vast lakes in north eastern Germany. Accompanied by our trusty e-bikes, we would setup camp with the van and sight-see on two wheels, including, by-the-buy, Beckett the killer pug in a basket. The thing is, dear worst-reader, this VW wunder-van is one cool piece of kit–and Beckett the killer pug, at fourteen, didn’t seem to mind hanging out with us. The worst-thing, though, I’m sure, is that we didn’t get to use half of what the VW Bulli is capable of. Reason for that requires a bit of nit-picking.

The Bad

It took us three to four nights to figure out the Bullies tech. For example. This vehicle/camper comes with an onboard diesel heater. It has a burner/heater underneath the cabin that siphons diesel from the vehicles tank. After the third night, when it got cold, we screwed something up with the onboard computer that controls the heater. We spent a night in six degrees celsius without heat. Thank goodness for German down covers and a lot of body heat, including whatever Beckett the killer pug could spare. The next morning customer service from the van rental company talked me through an onboard computer reset that required pulling a fuse underneath the driver’s seat. The reset worked. Which is a good thing cause we needed it as we received no favour from the weather for the rest of the trip.

The other issue was the propane tank and the twin stove burners that are part of the onboard kitchen that is included with this model of camping Bulli. There was a serious leak in the gas line which meant our gas bottle was empty after the first three nights–and I assure, dear worst-reader, we smelled it the whole time. Although it was easy replacing the propane bottle, there was nothing customer service could do for us regarding the leak–other than recommending we buy a separate camping burner so that would could cook our tea in the morning. After a bit of convincing (my better-half who was afraid of the obscene smell of propane) I resorted to opening and closing the propane bottle as we used the stove. An inconvenience but we got used to it–and nothing exploded.

Although the van is only two years old and has about twenty-thousand kilometres on it, it has probably gotten quite a bit of use. Camping–or as I’ve learned: Glamping–has surged during the pandemic for Germans. Considering the trickery of this vehicle, I’m wondering how many others have had issues with it and have dealt with those issues without respecting the extremely limited tolerances of how this thing is put together.

Another problem was the pop-up roof, which is where we slept the whole time on account it was just too cool to resist. As mentioned, we didn’t have a lot of luck with the North German weather. At times both wind and rain was brutal. This may or may not have caused the pop-up roof to not lock in place and the surrounding (roof) tent would sag. We had to lower and then raise the roof a few times so that it would re-lock. When not locked (or sagging) the lights in the cabin wouldn’t work, the board computer kept giving us weird warnings, all of which was especially problematic at night as the sides and front of the roof would flap around like a loose tent thereby scaring Dorothy in her quest for the Wizard of (my) Oz.

The last nit-pick I’ll mention has more to do with worst-moi than the vehicle. Although we rented a porti-potti I was hellbent on NOT pissing in a bucket, don’t you know. Since I grew up in poor suburban-hell #Americant I’ve had about enough of pissing in buckets. But that’s neither here nor there, eh, dear worst-reader. The most important thing about Glamping in an imaginary hippie vehicle is whether or not you can do it without an onboard toilet. Since we only stayed in camping parks, toilet access was no problem when climbing around the rooftop bed or walking in the middle of a cold night to the camping facilities.

The Good

It was a fight, don’t you know, dear worst-reader. My better-half wanted to go Glamping and I wanted room service with a short layover in Bangkok. Well. We know who won. The only concession I earned from the vacation fight was that we wouldn’t rent one of those uncool (spiesig) mobile home truck/camper/things–onboard toilet be damned! For worst-moi it was the VW camper–and dreams of hippies–or nothing. But get this, dear worst-reader. My better-half is so impressed with this vehicle after three weeks of first-world Glamping struggle, she asked a number of times if we should buy one. WTF? To make things worse, I didn’t immediately discard the question. The thing is, dear worst-reader, we are at the point in our lives where we don’t need a car. That is to worst-say, we need a car sometimes–like for extreme weather shopping and errands–but otherwise why not replace the car with a modern hippie van where we could take off every other weekend, getting more use out of four wheels, and if we need to do some shopping or run some errands we can easily do it with this van. That’s the trick with this vehicle, dear worst-reader. You can either camp in it or if you want to see parts of the inner city of a small town (or go shopping) in God knows where Europe you can park this thing anywhere a car can park. Which we did a number of times.

We drove for three weeks well over two thousand kilometres. The VW bus cruises on the Autobahn and back roads with ease and comfort–including DDR backroads. It has plenty of storage space, two beds, swivel driver and passenger seats and a heater that heats the cabin with ease–even when sleeping in the pop-up bed at some pretty low temperatures. Once we figured out how to use the leaky propane stove–which I’m sure can be easily fixed–we were able to cook several meals (zoodles with homemade Bolognese sauce and plenty of fresh eighteen month old parmesan or a cheese and mushroom omelette) in the cabin, subverting bad weather and allowing us to watch a movie on the iPad. Making fresh tea and coffee is a breeze. The fridge holds enough wine and cheese to help us watch a second iPad movie during another day of bad weather. Did I mention how well the friggin’ heater in this thing works (once we got it working)? Did I mention how bad the weather can be in Northern Germany in early June on the Baltic Sea? When connected to electricity there is plenty of USB ports for iPhones and iPads and normal juice for charging e-bike batteries. Oh. This thing comes with Apple Car Play–which I’m now convinced I would never buy a vehicle without. And while I’m on the subject of Apple. I even brought along one of our HomePod Minis to see if I could use it on-the-go. It works like a charm and there were a few nights jazz filled the camping halls of Valhalla and/or confused other pöbel campers with their convenient albeit ugly (uncool) campers–even though they do have built-in toilets. Heck. For going on sixty and having some pee-pee problems, I think I did pretty good finding my way to a toilet in the middle of a North German camping night.

The Oysters

As noted, we ended out trip on the island of Sylt. This was my second attempt to visit Sylt. The fist attempt was a disaster. Last October we had booked ten days in a cute little bungalow but because of the weather we skipped out on the last three days. I have never seen so much rain and wet in my life outside of tropical regions. Keep in mind, dear worst-reader, Sylt is a very special place for Das Volk. It is, as best as worst-writer can describe it, the ultimate German vacation spot–with the worst fcuking weather ever! What the heck draws so many Germans to this place is a mystery (to worst-moi). For. Don’t you know. The only way to reach this island is either by train or by fairy. This time we entered Sylt from Denmark and fairy. Otherwise you have to get to the island via a train you drive you car on and it carries you across the North Sea backwards for a few miles and you get all confused and it doesn’t matter because, well, at least there’s plenty of good wine, food and oysters once you get there. Wait. The weather on Sylt sucks.

Der Porsche Pöbel Insel Überhaupt

Yea. Sylt is the place where old Germans (the only ones, btw, who can afford them) take their Porsches to feel young again driving up and down the lone Sylt highway considering whether or not they’ll get Königsberg back or maybe, just maybe, they’ll get a chance to buy Greenland from Denmark before the #Trump-ist of my beloved & missed #Americant do. Or maybe not.

Putting all worst-writer nonsense aside, there is one redeeming factor to visit the German über-island of Sylt. Due to some sea barring goddess of Viking lore Sylt managed to import Irish oysters and now they’re everywhere in the muddy North Sea German waters. And if that ain’t bad enough, they’re f’n delicious. Keep in mind, dear worst-reader, worst-writer was born and reared around the Chesapeake Bay. There was a time when Chesapeake oysters ruled the world. Reason? The brackish waters of the bay produced über oysters. That is. They were everything Botticelli dreamed of when he was dreaming of The Birth of Venus. Sweat. Tender. The smell of the ocean when the sun shines upon her. The texture of human tongue languishing in the feminine of life that is seventy percent of her earth–that only a real man can reap. Or. The oysters from Sylt are so good I’ll go back when I can just to eat them (her).

And by-the-buy. The VW Bulli camper rocks. I’ll keep you posted if we get one.

Rant on.

-T

Dreaming Hippie Van

Dreaming Hippie-Van

It’s time, dear worst-reader. Better-halves of the world unite as the SHE decides what/where/how regarding all-things Holidays. In this case, the decision has been made to cruise around the Baltic Sea for a few weeks in a… wait for it.

That’s right. My better-half has decided, for this years holidays, to drive around in a house on wheels. In other worst-words, let the confrontation(s) begin.

The confrontation is the simple idear worst-writer can’t be seen in a house on wheels.

It’s too Spießig, I said.

But she insisted, claiming that we’re old enough to be a bit Spießig. I added that road campers give me the creeps because they remind me of how I should’ve ended up in life. For, don’t you know, dear worst-reader, there is somewhere in this grand world of worst a trailer in a trailer park on cinderblocks with my name on it but instead its lived in by #MAGA morons and #Americants of ill-repute who are unable to master any luck in their search for a life of leisure and/or sticking it to the man by not being a working-poor schmuck. But then she insisted and insisted and insisted and her masterful teary eyes, full of yearning and desire, for a camping vacation–that she’d always wanted… Yea. We know how this is gonna turn out.

Can’t we go to Thailand instead, I asked.

No, no, no, she said. I always wanted to go camping and now it’s time and we’ll do Thailand when the Covid thing has been declared over.

Really? We have to wait for the Covid thingy? I thought we have to worry about monkey-pox now? WTF!

Indeed. It may be time–both for compromise and a reality check about this worst-world of viruses galore. But then I had a idear.

Ok honey, I said. How bout this? We don’t do it in a house-on-wheels, which I think is embarrassing and scary, but how bout we rent a hippie-van? Yea. Hippie-vans are cool. Remember those?

A what, she said while those tears quickly dried and were as quickly replaced by woman-scorned skepticism.

You know, I added. Flowers on the dashboard. Maybe even a bobblehead of Elvis. We can forget the tie-dye t-shirts. I’ll let my beard grow and you’ll forget your bras and we’ll sleep in the back of a VW Bulli with hand painted peace signs all over it. How bout that?

She stepped away from the confrontation with her phone and started her google machine. A bit relieved that I had avoided a confrontation of blows, during breakfast the next morning, she blurted out that the VW Bulli thing is fine.

Wha…, I thought. I’m gonna have to get back to practicing ways to avoid all HER wishes with weak compromises. And with that in worst-mind, looks like I’m playing hippie in a hippie bus, come what may.

Rant on.

-T

Exploring Streaming, Finding Budgie

Worst-title 2: Doing my worst-best to discover the convenience of music streaming

As you’all may or mayn’t know, dear worst-readers, as an Apple fanboy, if I’m gonna finally break down (give-in) and try music streaming, it’s gotta be with Apple’s music service. Or?

Indeed-1

After a six month trial (on account I bought HomePod Mini’s last fall to provide stereo to the AppleTV I bought last year), it took me till the end of that trial to buckle down and finally figure out what this streaming krapp is all about. Yeah. Six months for free is one thing. Having to start paying for it is another. No. Seriously. I really didn’t think I was ready for music streaming. But here we are, eh.

As you certainly missed elsewhere in this worst-blog, here and here, I’ve been maintaining an SBC media server for audio and video for going on a decade now. That server has a quarter century of purchased CD music and DVD movies/tv and it’s done its job. But. As much as I’d like to keep on keeping-on with physical media, I have to worst-admit, even worst-writer has to go with the punches every once-a-once. Times not only be a’changing but maybe it’s not so bad to change a bit along with it. And so.

The question is: Which streaming service should I NOT use? That question, by-the-buy, is easy to answer. Since Spotify can’t register on my radar (on account it supports with around $100m the lie of the mind that is my beloved & missed #Americant via Joe new-born Limbaugh Rogan), the only other services to choose from that I know anything about is Amazon Music, Tidal or SoundCloud. Amazon music left a bad smell in my nose as I used what it included with Prime for a while. Both the streaming and the sound quality were awful. SoundCloud was much better at streaming, even though I only used its free-tier service. The other problem I had with SoundCloud was the music offering. Although it has lots of new artists doing lots of great music, that’s just not how my music taste rolls. That worst-said, I consider SoundCloud to be the most original music streamer out there. It’s definitely staying on my radar for the future. As far as Tidal is concerned, even though I never tested it, I knew it could be an option because it streamed lossless audio. Again. Amazon’s Music service didn’t do music justice. Higher quality bitrates or better bandwidth cannot and should not be compromised here. But then… uh oh. Apple bumped up its service to lossless and I have to admit–I’m impressed.

Indeed-2

The thing is dear worst-reader, it took me years to get used to iTunes. Remember iTunes? Once I got used to ripping and encoding my CDs to FLAC, I then had to re-encode them to the highest bitrate MP3 so my music would work with iTunes. For years I maintained two music libraries. My better-half could then use the simplicity of iTunes for her music needs and when I needed CD quality, I used other players that supported FLAC. As frustrating as all that was, I got used to it. The banality, btw, of having to do that was because Apple is either greedy, stupid or just outright spiteful towards open-source (FLAC) or it had made too many promises to the music industry–which doesn’t make sense to me because I always bought my CDs. But on that worst-note, I should die-gress.

Almost conclusion

Now that I’m a paying, streaming customer, the question lingers whether or not I’m gonna stick with it. It’s been about two months since taking Apple Music seriously. In that time I can’t say that streaming has knocked my socks off. Then again, the convenience when out-and-about and calling up a song is kinda cool–especially when the streaming quality is better than anything I experienced previously (Amazon). When at home and streaming to my stereo system from iPhone, iPad or Mac, Apple’s lossless rivals any quality I achieved using FLAC. Then there’s the interface…

Sucky interfaces

The Apple Music (app) interface sucks. And get this. It sucks more than iTunes ever did. As a top category for picking/choosing music it has what it weirdly calls Apple Music. This category designates Apple’s streaming service. Oh really. The streaming service has three sub-categories namely Listen Now, Browse and Radio. Whaaaaa? WTF do I need Radio for? Go into one of the other categories and you’re overwhelmed with choices galore that somehow are deemed worthy by those who set up this $hit. The only way I’ve been able to find music is by using search, the results of which are as confusing as anything else. Wait. Am I too old for this krapp? #Nomatter

Another category in the Music app is Library. This is something like what iTunes used to be–I’m guessing. It has sub-categories that makes sense that the streaming service (above) doesn’t have. This is the users library which stems out of all your owned music that is converted into this service when you activate it. That conversion, btw, is another reason I postponed or was skeptical to sign up in the first place. Now that I know how NOT to loose my music data to Apple (by maintaining my media library on a separate server), I’ve simply added some of my music here and now it’s part of my library. Which is cool on account I had lost a few songs from Aerosmith and Bad Company and now I have them back–until I cancel. Whoopi! Which begs another worst-question: If I’m streaming music why do I need a library? Ok. At least Library has subcategories that I can relate to like Album and Artist. But. Again. I’m now using a streaming service and…? Ok. I don’t get it and I probably have to spend some more time to figure it out. Then again, who are the people (automatons) that come up with this $hit in Cupertino? Die-gress.

Audio tech confusion

There’s another little issue that’s bugging me, dear worst-reader. Now that I may or mayn’t become a music streamer, I’m also an avid non-audiophile. After years of fiddling with the idear of being an audiophile, I gave up on that krapp toot-sweet. The only thing the audiophile world taught me was that audio equipment sucks–and the industry is filled with grifters–like the bicycle industry, btw. Does that mean there’s no quality differences in audio reproduction? Heck not. There are huge differences. But audio reproduction can be scary–above and beyond being a money pit. Hence I couldn’t wait to get rid of all that dead-weight that was/is the BS of surround-sound, hi-res, fifty pound amps, DVD vs Bluray and, the worst of the worst, subwoofers. It took me the better part of twenty years to figure out that all I need is STEREO. Since then, after the discovery of Raspberry Pi and managing a home media server, all my audio equipment is the cheapest best sounding music reproduction I’ve ever heard.

And one more thing

What I dislike about audiophile BS is the krapp between amp, pre-amp, volume control, input-output, cinch, DAC, subwoofer, etc., etc. Obviously this technical krapp has to be dealt with if one is not gonna listen to music through laptop speakers or wants to enjoy music as one sees fit thereby getting on with the digital age–and not breaking the bank. When I can, I prefer streaming music from my Mac to one of three Airplay speakers in my little townhouse. Reason? The Mac (to worst-moi) sounds best–and I can’t figure out why–compared to streaming from my iPhone. A second set of stereo speakers are in our bookshelf and are driven by a RaspberryPi and a Hifiberry Amp2 (60w class D amp). A third set of stereo speakers are upstairs in my workroom and are connected to a second RaspberryPi using a Hifiberry DacPlus that is connected to a Teac mini integrated amp. Considering that two of these players use an open-source version of Airplay (shairport), it all works like a charm–with only a few hiccups here or there.

The hiccups are mostly about volume control–or is it pre-amping? Here’s an example. There is a significant difference in audio quality when streaming Apple Music using the Mac system volume or using the volume control in the app. WTF! Should I have paid more attention during my frivolous audiophile days concerning what the fcuk a pre-amp is? I’m guessing this has something to do with how these devices differentiate sources. To try and figure this out, dear worst-reader, I even rode my e-bike to a local Apple Store and asked one of the blue-shirts what this is all about. The answer was the same as most answers I get from blue-shirts: Wow. That’s above my pay-grade. You buying a new Apple Watch or not? They had no idear what I was talking about. But at least they did suggest I get in contact with Apple support online. Who could have known, eh. (Sarcasm off.)

Worst-conclusion

I’ve never been into modern pop-music. It’s one of the reasons I’ve avoided music streaming services. Is that a generational thing? Maybe. That brings me to a few worst-questions: What am I paying for? What if I don’t like the music being pushed? Why is there so much disparity between music source and music player? Is this all about convenience? I mean. Yeah. It is convenient. WTF! Seriously. After fiddling with this for the past six months, I still don’t care about whatever Apple is pushing. That’s what streaming services do first, right? That worst-said, the other day, on a whim, I asked Siri to play me some Budgie. And she did. Now that takes me back to a time (70s) where three Englander-dudes played music as though they never had fun doing anything else. Seriously. They make music as though it’s better than making…

But I die-gress.

Thanking you for all the good-luck wishes in exploring music streaming services (at my age) and dealing with the Godzilla of monopolies that is in my worst-face every fcuking day: Apple.

Rant on.

-T

Proto Felony Murder

Worst-title 2: The history of abortion (in #Americant)

Until the latter part of the 20th century, there was no support in American law for a constitutional right to obtain an abortion. Zero. None.

Wow. I especially like the zero and none in the quote above. They are words a husband would use when talking to his wife about whether or not she can…

Don’t worry, dear worst-reader. If you’re unaware of the history of abortion in my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant, you’re not alone. But have no fear. The recent release of a ninety-eight page preliminary Opinion from #SCOTUS is all you’ll need. Indeed. Read it, like I just did, and you’ll know all you need to know–and then some. And don’t worry if you’re intimidated by legalese, other than the various uses of Latin, it’s a hoot to read.

For example. Get a load of the term quick fetus or quickening or quick-child. It’s used a quite a bit in this document. This stems out of a time when most people were clueless to how baby’s are made. All they knew was that a woman was with child and eventually the child in her would move. Hence, unenlightened knuckle dragging white men say: it’s life. And the sun still evolves around the earth, eh. Or is the earth too flat for that? (Sarcasm off.)

What about the title of this worst-post, Proto felony murder? Now that’s a doozy. In worst-writer’s reading of this whacked-out nut-mob stuck in the past opinion this terminology stems out of the same time mentioned above–where no one knew where baby’s come from–but connects those who perform abortions as enablers of a crime. This immediately made me think of what’s going on Texas right now. You know, they’ve not only banned abortion, can prosecute those who perform abortion, but they have put a bounty on the heads of those who assist in abortion. You know. Like an Über driver, a friend or even a husband/boyfriend/lover. Wow.

In reference to the 14th Amendment, check this out:

We hold that Roe and Casey must be overturned. The Constitution makes no reference to abortion, and no such right is implicitly protected by any constitution provision, including the one on which the defenders of Roe and Casey now chiefly rely–the Due Process Clause of the Fourteenth Amendment. That provision has been held to guarantee some rights that are not mentioned in the Constitution, but any such rights must be “deeply rooted in this Nation’s history and tradition” and “implicit in the concept of ordered liberty.” (Bold text mine.)

WTF does ordered liberty mean? Is that like new world order where corporations run the $hitshow? Or is it something the establishment holds over the wanton masses of a consume-to-survive life for having too much fun with bodily fluid exchange? All the above? I’ll refrain worst-writing anything about deeply rooted in this Nation’s history and tradition. Other than to worst-say, holly bat$hit is #Americant fcuked if these right-wingers get away with this krapp. Reason? The stuff in this Opinion, if submitted, is as heavy and deep as slavery, Native American genocide, war-mongering and two and half centuries of greed and nothing but greed. Even worse. This Opinion could enable turning back the suffrage movement, civil rights, gay rights, etc. Dark ages here we come. Oh wait. It’s already here. Indeed. Let’s go with Dark Ages version two.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Dissecting A Joke

Dissecting A Joke

Time-stamp of vid is 3:51

Worst-title 2: Pete Buttigieg can watch my grandchildren anytime.

Wow, dear worst-reader. Did you get a load of President Biden’s WHCD speech the other night? Even though I voted for him, grew up in MD, which neighbours (his) DE, I’ve never been a fan. Reason? He’s part of that cult of the Democratic Party that turned too far to the right to appease the wackiness of Ronald Reagan and his cohorts, the results of which is the kinda hell we’re living in now. As a senator his performance during the confirmation hearing of Clarence Thomas, grilling Anita Hill, was despicable–I remember watching it. Serving over fifty years as an elected official, as noble as many find it, is also nothing to brag about when one considers how politicians these days afford their election campaigns. But. Again. Considering what my beloved & missed #Americant puked with the election of the #MAGA cult, I’ll vote for Biden again. Best of the worst, eh. Or. What else are (rational thinking people) gonna do (vote for)? #Nomatter

Worst-writer digs WHCD. Wait. I dig the comedy acts. But sometimes even the presidents get involved in the entertainment. Barry-O’s last WHCD was awesome. Since former prez pee-pee-hair is too thin skinned to participate–because he knows he’ll be drilled a new one (arse) with comedy galore–the whole show has been shut down for the past six years. Enter Joe Biden the comedian. And what an entry, dear worst-reader.

The joke I want to dissect is short lived. At about 3:51 in the vid, Biden says this:

I told my grandkids and Pete Buttigieg they could stay up late tonight.

The crowd got it. I got it. But did you?

Pete Buttigieg is the Secretary of Transportation appointed by Biden. He’s also gay, married to a man, and they both have children. For those of you not in the know, Mayer Pete’s attributes cause about seventy-four million #MAGA voting, former prez cheeto-jezus whack-jobs, to lose their $hit. Reason? Well. As we all know, right-wing nut-jobs in my beloved & missed #Americant have waaaaay bunches of hate all bottled up inside them. They hate minorities, a woman’s right to choose, people who don’t buy armoured tanks and bazookas and assault rifles every weekend and they especially hate gays and lesbians and gays and lesbians that think they have the right, like everyone else, to get married. Yeah. Lot of hate there, eh.

The worst-thing is, dear worst-reader, right-wing nut-jobs have unleashed hell on my beloved & missed #Americant’s different thinkers, different idear makers, different ways of lifers. In lieu of this, they are censoring books in various states that may or may not contain what they consider dubious stuff. They are passing archaic laws repressing LGBTQ rights. They are gerrymandering voting districts to coincide with their hate and bigotry. And, as I was just reading in the newz, their stolen SCOTUS is in the perfect position to finally ban a woman’s right to make her own decisions. As all of this right-wing legislating has been going down for the past forty years, what do they resort to now? They make fun of people–as they’ve always done but it was well hidden–like Pete Buttigeig because he’s gay, he’s married, and he has a family with his husband. If you listen not-so closely to most right-wing talking heads, they too have a bunch of ugly things to say. And so.

Biden’s dig the other night was f’n brilliant. For you see, dear worst-reader, unfortunately there’s more to their hate. Take for example the term groomers. This is the gist of Biden’s joke. Right-wing nut-jobs, especially the religious fanatics, you know, the folk in #Americant that have gone full and comfortable heathen with krapp like prosperity theology, think all people that don’t adhere to archaic religious dogma by choosing a different lifestyle, are or can be groomers. The rest of #Americant should be afraid of groomers because groomers are after the children. WTF!

The only worst-question that remains, considering the state of the world right now, is how much worse can these arseholes make things? If only there was some kind of politic that could stand up to all this. (Sarcasm off.)

Rant on.

T

Convolutionism

One of the issues worst-writer is struggling with in the whole bunches of #interwebnet content, whether on the youtubes or whatever website, which is mostly progressive and lefty on my part, is how easy it is to convolute the/any issue. Since I follow as much world news as I can, and I’m thankful to be able to do so at such low cost, there are moments when I just can’t comprehend the POV of some folk. I’m referring to right and left political punditry. Political punditry, as informative as it can be, has an agenda above and beyond opinion and editorialising. That’s especially true when it comes to the vast amount of opinions that can be so easily published (worstwriter), shared, or, when all goes well, it goes viral. And that’s fine & dandy. Everyone (who can’t figure out the trick like worst-writer can) has to make their way though this life. Or? The worst-thing is, dear worst-reader, over the years, of the lefty stuff I consume on the #interwebnets, it’s getting fewer and far between. Not the stuff, mind you. The pundits.

As a pseudo-lefty (I am worst-writer) I don’t consume much right-wing media. Can’t stomach it. Reason? Right-wingers make me cringe. How’s that? Well. Maybe it’s because 1) we (humanity) can’t choose our parents and 2) having grown up in their (right-wing) neighbourhoods I couldn’t wait to expatriate to a different part of the friggin world? Or maybe it’s because right-wingers, down deep, are incapable of original thought? #Nomatter. I should die-gress. Indeed. I should die-gress because, well, most of the people I worst-write about here don’t really call themselves right-wingers. Yeah. I should leave that. Remember, this is a worst-post about convolutionism. Moving on.

I’m not sure of the date/day when it began but there were, let’s worst-say, a bunch of writers, YouTubers, pundits, I liked. Now? I’m not much of a fan. The reason I don’t like them isn’t so much their politics or punditry but instead some of them seem to have… I don’t know what to call it. Do I mean that some of these writers and pundits and YouTubers have a huge, massive chip on their shoulders? Yeah. That’s the ticket.

I liked these people because I thought they were doing unbiased journalism, even if it was sometimes clouded in punditry. I feel confident enough at my age and literary knowledge to be able to filter stuff I consume on the #interwebnets. At least I can filter out the stuff that makes me cringe. But. As worst-said, something has gone awry with these people. And I don’t get it.

Glenn Greenwald is one. I thought he was a heck of guy having helped out Edward Snowden in his time of need. But look where that got Snowden. I also liked Max Blumenthal. I ate up his book Republican Gomorrah. Then there’s Lee Camp. Although his wiki page describes him as a comedian, his show on RT America was a blast to watch because he made it uniquely informative. Since the cancelling of RT America, due to sanctions, Camp has to find a new means of distribution, which I’m sure he will. And what about all the talking-heads that seem to have exploded in recent years due to YouTubes and so-called social media that are very good at serving the industrial punditry complex? Like Jimmy Dore. He was a great voice on TYT. But something happened there that I’ve never quite understood. The comedy spots on Dore’s YouTubes show are hi-larry-us. Then there’s the Joe Rogan. He was the first #interwebnet talking-head that I gave up on account, even though he’s a great interviewer, he just sounds too much like a Rush Limbaugh spawn that puts nasty-chills in my tummy. Can you see Rogan becoming the new & improved Limbaugh as soon as his fancy and lucrative streaming contract runs its course? But. Again. I should die-gress.

The skill these people have, above and beyond writing, journalism and showmanship, is convolution. That’s not to say they don’t know what they are talking/writing about. It’s more about how they know exactly what they’re doing but they’re doing it in a way that serves something other than the subject matter. Take for example Russia’s invasion of Ukraine. Greenwald and Blumenthal easily convolute what is an illegal invasion of a sovereign country by Russia with my beloved & missed #Americant’s foreign policy of the last, shall we say, hundred and fifty years. Obviously they are focusing mostly on the US invasion of Iraq–which was illegal and unwarranted IMHO. They do this by screaming and yelling at Democrats and all they hate about Democrats. Or is it the establishment? It’s mind boggling at best and ordinary at least. Greenwald’s almost fanatical punditry that spews his hate of Hillary Clinton is absurd and delegitimising. Blumenthal at times does the same thing. And although they may or mayn’t say they like former prez pee-pee-hair and his #MAGA cult, they sure do have a lot to say about The Left instead. I guess, for them, it’s all about everything but the problem. Does that mean, in the world of punditry, there are no solutions? 

The article below motivated this post.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Boom Boom… Bang

When I was a kid, dear worst-reader, I played a few sports here and there. By the time I got to #Americant suburban hell high-school, at the encouragement of my sister, who knew that I wasn’t gonna be strong in academics (I am worstwriter), I decided to try my luck with sports. Playing sports, though, meant choices had to be made.

There are three seasons of sports in #Americant schools: fall, winter and spring. Prior to my first year in high-school, during open late summer try-outs, I was accepted to play football. After failing to be fast enough, strong or big enough, nor could I catch the leather egg shaped ball, an assistant coach saw me throw that ball. I was immediately told to report to the try-out area for quarterbacks. Within the first few weeks of the start of my first year of high-school, I was starting quarterback for the junior varsity team.

For the winter season I decided not to wrestle or play basketball. Although I tried wrestling, it wasn’t for me. Basketball? Na. Spring was a different story. For spring I was torn between baseball and tennis. I was leaning toward tennis but there was a hurdle. In baseball the only equipment you need to bring are the shoes or cleats. Same for football. Although it was frowned upon, I could use my football cleats on the baseball field (diamond). Tennis, on the other hand, required shoes and a racket. Now. There were loaner rackets but they were all old and rickety and scratched to hell. This was a time, the late 70s, when wood was still used to make tennis rackets. And then there are the shoes. Ok. I did have a second-hand tennis racket that a neighbour gave me, which is what I used on local tennis courts. But it wasn’t much better than the loan rackets from my school. You get the picture being worst-written here? I couldn’t afford the equipment. What could any low middle-class broken home kid do? #Nomatter

Long worst-story short, my mother pulled through and bought a new pair of Chucks (converse) for me but she said I’d have to play with my old racket and I’ve have to make the shoes last. Wow, I thought. At least I’m getting a new pair of shoes. The thing is, my style of serving on hard tennis courts, where I dragged the tip of my right foot all the time, meant that my shoes didn’t last very long. But guess what. My mom came through again. She found this really cheap jell like substance that I could add to my chucks so they wouldn’t wear down as fast. And that was that. Spring time meant tennis. Yeah. Thanks mom.

Do I regret choosing tennis over baseball? Sometimes. Maybe I could have made something of myself in baseball. But now that I’m older, looking back, I’m good with my choices. It all almost worked out. I mean. Being more than a high-school athlete was never in the cards for worst-moi. I don’t have the genetics for it or the mindset. But it did provide me with a touch of knowledge about how to judge the athletes in this world that do make it. When I watch a football game today, I can still feel the grass under old, raggedy cleats. I can still smell the air from night games. The sound of men crushing each other after making the perfect step in the direction to get that goofy ball to the end zone, rings loud. NFL players are wonders of the universe, dear worst-reader. Just like professional soccer players or olympic athletes and I know what they’ve all endured–because what I endured was only speck compared to them. That worst-said. I do not idealise professional athletes. Although I’m sure most of them have the genetics–or should I worst-say natural born athleticism–more than most don’t have the mindset. But hey! We all gotta make a living. So what the fcuk.

One of the greatest athletes of my youthful time in sports was Boris Becker. I called him Boom-Boom Becker. The thing is, my high-school tennis coach advised me to watch as much tennis as I could when I wasn’t practicing–or doing homework (yeah, right). He told me to watch player’s styles and the way they hold and dribble the ball before serving. Watch the way both feet leave the ground as they serve. Check out where they place their thumb on the racket during backhand swings. Watch how they move around the court, the foot work. And then he added, the most important thing of all when it comes to playing tennis: look at how they watch that ball. They have hawk eyes for that ball.

Boom Boom Becker is one of my favourite tennis players. I also liked John McEnroe but he had one of the weirdest serves in tennis history. For serving he would position himself at the outer most part of the baseline, right next to the singles court line. He then started this wave like motion with the ball and racket together, bending his knees deeper than anyone, and on his way up to meet the ball, he slapped it. Did his style make his placement in the service box effective? Sure enough. Boom Boom, on the other hand, had the coolest serve. He would place himself as most servers did, next to the baseline centre mark. He too would start a waving motion with the ball and racket as though calibrating the two. The way he would throw the ball in the air and then perfectly meet it at its apex… boom! His serves would rocket across the net as though Zeus himself was on his side. Didn’t he win his first Wimbledon at seventeen, the youngest ever, with an ace?

Athletes and mindset are a thing to wonder, dear worst-reader. Unfortunately, in these times, natural born athletes that want to make it bigger than big, have to find ways to numb the mindset. Professional bike racers do it to the hilt, hence they’re all doped to the hilt so as to endure the physical as well as mental pain. Olympic athletes? Don’t get me started. Remember, dear worst-reader, we’re living in times where entire nations are banned from Olympic competition because their own countries pass out the dope. And what about football players? Oh my. What a drug fest that must be these days with the amount of NFL games they have to play per season. Yeah. Better living through chemicals is all about turning off the mental so that the physical blast through the wilds of the universe with a record forty yard dash will curb the mindset of of of… But hey. We all gotta make a living. At least make a living while the game is on.

My better-half and I were chitchatting about Boom Boom the other night as he was being sentenced to jail in London for doing a whole bunch of stupid $hit with other peoples money. I asked my wife if she felt bad for him (she’s more German than I am). She kinda does but added that jail time seems a bit harsh. I told her I don’t feel bad for Boom Boom but I do question how he has to go to jail when so many other institutions, corporations, CEOs, bankers, all of ‘em, go Scott-free after ripping the world off. And that’s the ticket, ain’t it, dear worst-reader? The only time people go to jail for this $hit is when it involves other peoples money, especially the money of the bankers, corporations, institutions, etc.

Can’t wait to see how Boom Boom looks when he gets out.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

The Unbearable Lightness of Authoritarians

Worst-writer’s choice of title is playing, of course, with the title of the novel The Unbearable Lightness of Being by Milan Kundera. Who else hasn’t played with it, e.g. The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent maybe? Which I can’t wait to see. Or what about my second choice for title?

How the big lie swats away truth like its the baby’s bottom of communism version two point zero

Or how bout this one.

Under threat of state and authoritarian persecution, in the united mistakes of #Americant , are you ready to retract?

As I’ve worst-written here and here, I really dig Milan Kundera. I had a great time back in the day reading those novels. As a child of the Cold War he was part of my understanding of how that war played out in the minds of a whole bunch of #Eurowastelanders. Reason? Just as I was moving across the pond (expatriating) the wall fell. I got to know a few Eastern Europeans during and after that. Who doesn’t love peoples from western territories of the former Soviet Union all lusting for Marlboro reds, Levis, fun, and a ride across Berlin in a taxi that is also a Mercedes? And you gotta admire all those cute little countries that found their way to the west, aka as far as possible from what would become Soviet Union v.2 aka Vladimira Pussytina. But let’s not get-on about Latvia, Estonia, Moldova or, heaven forbid, Ukraine. More worst-writing about Ukraine here and here.

Milan Kundera’s work became even more profound for me as the realities of the post Soviet experiment came to light. Having moved to western Germany, it was all kinda close, don’t you know. Remember that whole East German Stasi thing? What a $hitshow that was. In other eastern countries things were getting worst and worse and worster. Remember Georgia? You know, Stalins birthplace. Oh yea. What about Yugoslavia? Croatia is the best place for hiking and mountain biking these days. Let’s not forget what’s happening in Ukraine that’s been brewing for the last decade. But. Again. I’m off worst-subject. And this worst-post ain’t about worst-writers mis-understanding of über-novels, commies or how fcuked-up #Eurowasteland really is.

After watching the video above, my worst-writer hat is off to Rachel Maddow. And don’t worry–I’m only a farfetched fan. There are times when I have to turn her podcast off (which is how I get her shows this side of the pond) on account she can carry on and on and on about whatnot. Is that what journalists call carrying-on, rambling, shootin the $hit, or is it all just editorialising? #Nomatter.

The juicy part of the vid that motivates this worst-post is at about 4:10 when Maddow shows how a journalist is being targeted for investigation by police because the journalist did some journalism. Now. That’s fine and dandy. These are worst-times to be living in, eh. What with #fakenews this or the media-that or CNN sucks or why the fcuk is Wolf Blitzer still on air? Wasn’t he on air when I expatriated thirty-five-friggin years ago? Anywho.

Maddow, at the beginning of the vid, makes it clear how/why so many #Americants hate the press. Again. Fine and dandy. Stupid people gotta live too, right? But here’s the thing. Maddow doesn’t make it clear how/why this is bigger than the press. Ever heard of death by a thousand cuts? Or what about creeping normality? Indeed.

So #Amercants hate the press because former prez pee-pee-hair said loud and clear, year after year, the big lie. #fakenews Maddow does a great job explaining that. Authoritarian rhetoric is to those of us who have a bit of knowledge about history exactly what authoritarians, totalitarians, dictators do best–especially to the dumb down masses. #Maga The thing is, though, they (authoritarians) aren’t just attacking the press. They drill the lie so deep into people that no one can think straight anymore. So who or what, in the vid, at the behest of the LA Sheriff, need be investigated for? Or. Put another worst-way. Who/what need be investigated or arrested or brought to justice because a journalist did her job reporting police abuse? Wait. What? Police abuse? What police abuse? Wow. So many unanswered worst-questions. Go figure. #FakeNews #Americant #Maga #Trump

Almost The Question

If/when succeeding with the big lie becomes the norm, what are the rest of us (rational thinking peoples) gonna do about the seventy-four or so million Cheeto-Jezus lovers and the guys that want to be just like him–as in the video? At the least, everything fake is here to stay for a while, eh. And now the police are not only abusing citizens but they are getting so bad at doing it that their over-reach is blatantly anti constitutional, anti freedom, anti antifa–but never anti-pee-pee-hair former presidents. Are these authoritarian types starting to show their true colours? Have they already and worst-writer missed it? Na. Don’t think so.

The Question

That brings me to the essence of my worst-question, dear worst-reader–that may or may not have to do with the video above. How were the police going to question the journalist if/when she has to face what ever it is the police do when they put someone under investigation like this? Keep in mind, as I worst-write this post, the situation seems to have simmered down because the police have faced a pretty significant backlash from lawyers of the fourth estate. But my question still remains. What is the intention of police investigating a journalist who has 1) broke no law or 2) has freedom of the press? Take her in a back room somewhere and interrogate her about her beliefs? Who she voted for? Is she part of the red scare? Does the journalist pictured, the one the policeman points to the most, look like a commie? See how he points his stick at her? Who are her sources? Who is the policeman talking to? #MAGA THE LAND OF FREEDOM TO BE STUPID, baby?

And now. The Unbearable Lightness of Being. In the book, dear worst-reader, Tomas (no relation) is apprehended by local goons (government minions) under the auspices of the totalitarian Soviet State that has occupied Czechoslovakia in the late 1960s. The reason he’s apprehended? He wrote some kind of an essay or manifesto that made objectionable comparisons to the communist takeover of his country with some Ancient Greek tell-tale about sons sleeping with their mothers and killing their fathers. You know. Typical literary stuff that puts chills into the spines of authoritarians since most of them couldn’t intellectually fight their way out of wet paper bags made from the foreskin of… And so they just get everyone to pledge their allegiance to Dear Leader. Or else.

I’m only guessing that the police, while publicly threatening a journalist, without cause, even showing her picture as though she was a suspect in a crime–which she clearly is not–because she’s a journalist and there is this thing known as freedom of the press and and and… Bare with me as I try to work through this.

I don’t know what the police want to investigate. And I don’t care. After seeing the video, dear worst-reader, all-things unbearable started to appear before all my worst-eyes. Are they after her sources? Did her story insult the police? Has she pulled a Snowden? Again. Don’t care. The thing I do care about is if things in my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant get so right-wing bat$hit that there is no no way out. Are we almost there? Are the police gonna start rounding up people and make them retract–their stories, their posts, their tweets? I mean. The definition of freedom has pretty-much been turned upside-down, especially considering how right-wingers use it to promote everything #fakenews or lost elections or voting rights. At the worst-least, is what I’m failing to get at in this worst-post in anyway comparable to goons that want to suppress all forms of dissent in a totalitarian state? Tomas, btw, was a doctor. When he wouldn’t publicly retract his manifest he lost his license to practice medicine and he never gave up on that conviction. Are we just a hop-skip-jump away from that? I know I’m stretching things here. But that’s how I feel after watching this video. That policeman looks like someone who wants to interrogate another person NOT for crimes but for her beliefs, her loyalties, her bent knee, who’s your daddy, obey, etc. Wow.

The thing that scares me the most with what’s happening to my beloved & missed #Americant is the creeping normality, the death by a thousand cuts that so many #Americants can’t see because they can’t see straight anymore after not only the big lie but their own inability #okboomer to get it together intellectually, socially or politically. Wow. And to think I saw it all coming forty years ago–a good ten years after I had to live in what Ronald Reagan began.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Martial Law v Marshall Law

Marshall Law could be a name. A cool name. Or it might be the name of some cheesy #Americant tv show. Martial Law, on the other hand, is not a name but is what authoritarians seem to luv–as much, I’m worst-sure, as they luv cheesy, mansplaining #Americant tv. Worst-writer can see mixing them up, especially if one is in a hissy-fit twenty-four-seven on account their existence, upbringing and world-view–not excluding #Americant public schooling–of white supremacy is threatened. In fact, after a bat$hit congress-person used the former instead of the latter, because she either can’t spell or the spell-checker misfired or she simply doesn’t know what she’s talking/tweeting about, I did my own little un-empirical test. Keep in mind, worst-writer has sympathy for misspelling, including a bit of worst-grammar. For I am worstwriter dot com, don’t you know. But my sympathy stems out of having lived abroad for most of my life where I also speak a foreign language ninety percent of the time. In fact, after all these years I’m very afeared to write that foreign language on a daily basis because doing so might show how worst if not kinda stupid I really am. But on that worst-note, I die-gress.

The un-empirical test I tried went thus. I went into the google-machine and started typing marsh… (pics above). Turns out that it’s pretty clear if one knows what one is talking/tweeting about, has a bit of sense and intellect–or may have read a book or three in life–it’s kinda hard to misspell martial law. With that in worst-mind, is it of any surprise that the hacks and bigots and inner-ugly people that get elected to run the greed $hitshow that is #Americant are as dumb as they look/sound/tweet? You betcha, baby. So let’s have a giggle together, dear worst-reader. But don’t giggle too long as us worst-thinking people need to remain aware and vigilant about the rise of authoritarianism in my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Settling Family Business, KGB Godfather Style

Wow, dear worst-reader. Can things get any worst–for Russian oligarchs? I bet it can. You know why I’m making that bet? There are quite a few Russian oligarchs out there and it looks like Putin has only gotten to a half dozen of them. You know. Putin is settling family business. Like in the Godfather movie. The invasion of Ukraine is his alibi, don’t you know. Michael Corleone’s alibi was a godchild’s baptism, wasn’t it? Is there a difference between a godchild baptism and invading a country? OK. Let’s cut to the worst-chase. Putin is a wannabe pseudo-godfather nation-state two-bit peasant dictator and the world should hate him. Oh. And. Things are probably gonna get a lot more worst for Putin.

But what about all the dead oligarchs popping up all over the place?

Worst-writer is sure there isn’t a lot of mourning going on for a few dead Russian oligarchs. But I do feel for their families, especially when their children are being slaughtered along side them. Considering how these men got rich in the first place, dear worst-reader… wow. What a $hitshow of greed the sell-off of the Soviet Union must have been. Can you see it? Naked, knuckle dragging white men clamouring up walls of human flesh, grinding and piercing through bloodied skin and eyes and babies, making their way to the top. Obviously, over the past twenty or so years, Putin won the $hitshow of greed. Or did he? Could that be why he’s in such a panic right now? Add to that the left-behind and forgotten peasantry of Russia not being capable of ever knowing the difference between freedom and dictatorship… Yeah. What a f’n mess.

Since the start of the Ukraine war here’s what Putin has accomplished, according to worst-writer:

  • His February 22 speech was so bat$hit crazy, more on that here, history is gonna laugh at him forever
  • After more than two months of fighting he’s gotten himself into a quagmire which might be worse than The Soviet Union’s Afghanistan fiasco in the 1980s
  • He underestimated The West’s resolve to fight against him without committing to a land war
  • If reports are correct about Russian military performance, a well equipped Ukraine might be the least of Putin’s problems

The only worst-question remaining is how much death and damage and misery will this small-Schwanz-man leave behind?

Godspeed Ukraine!

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Look Where

Source of pic: screenshot with some extra safety

Can you believe it, dear worst-reader. My better half finally singed up for one of those streaming services. I mean. We’ve actually tried it before but gave up on it pretty quick. That was back in 2015. Something about there just not being much available that was worth couch time. Since we’ve been able to stream via a certain online distribution website, as movies and shows are included with its yearly subscription, we’ve kinda settled for that. Till now. I guess. The reality is, my better-half watches this stuff more than I do and for the past year she’s been complaining about not having anything new to watch. Oh well.

We decided long ago that we would avoid subscription services in our media consumption. Instead we relied on AppleTV and would pay for whatever it is we watch. But then AppleTV+ hit and I had just purchased a new MacBook, which meant that I got the service for free for a year. I have to admit, I kinda liked it–even though I didn’t renew it after a year when it costs money. Even though some of Apple’s shows were a bit–how should I worst-put this–almost amateurish, more recent productions have definitely moved things to a higher level. So when my better-half wanted to sign up, I tried to push for Apple. As usual, I lost that argument, which I might be kinda sad about. Boo-who. But. I am using Apple Music right now after they offered me a six month free trial. Why does it hurt me to admit that I like it? Since I have to start paying for it next month, we’ll see how long I really like it. Moving on.

Pseudo-Review: Don’t Look Up

My better-half is pleased so far. She binge-watched a tv series the other weekend and enjoyed it. We watch our first movie together the other night and I’m not disappointed. The movie: Don’t Look Up. And that brings worst-moi to a few worst-words about it.

First. Great movie. Great acting. Ok directing. Sufficient drama–or in this case comedy. Like I’ve worst-said here and here about comedy, especially political and social satire, what now? Also. Who is this movie for? I mean, is there an intended audience? If you haven’t seen it, here’s worst-writer’s summary. And be warned. Spoiler alert!

The planet is about to be struck by a humungous asteroid or comet. A planet killing comet. Two scientists who discovered the comet are summoned into a/the world of politics and media in order to advise the president of my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant about how to deal with this comet. The president is a woman and her chief of staff is her son and as the story progresses these politicians unabashedly become the spitting image of former prez pee-pee-hair, his family, and all the corruption and ineptitude and greed-mongering that went along with it. But this movie is a comedy. Or. Put another way. This movie is a satire. With that in mind, let’s take a short break and look it up, shall we.

Satire is a genre of the visual, literary, and performing arts, usually in the form of fiction and less frequently non-fiction, in which vices, follies, abuses, and shortcomings are held up to ridicule, often with the intent of shaming or exposing the perceived flaws of individuals, corporations, government, or society itself into improvement. Although satire is usually meant to be humorous, its greater purpose is often constructive social criticism, using wit to draw attention to both particular and wider issues in society. -Source: Wiki

Now. This film is probably the busiest left-wing, environmental film I’ve ever seen where it does its best to shun a genre by just showing reality in a hi-larry-us way. I mean. Obviously. The writer’s intention with this movie is to provide one of the clearest mirrors ever that would/could/should enable so many people, like the seventy-four or so million who voted for former prez Cheeto-Jezus, to take a good look at reality. The thing about mirrors, though, is you can’t make people look into it–unless it’s about vanity. Am I wrong. The other problem is, even if you get someone to look into a mirror absent vanity, you can never really know if they know what they are seeing. A manipulated mind do play tricks, eh. Which brings me back to my question: who is this movie for? Is it a way to busy creative types? Is it a movie to motivate those who already know that the planet killing comet is a metaphor for climate change–and we’re doomed #nomatter what? Or did the producers of this movie get a freebie where they were able to show Meryl Streep’s gorgeous Arschgeweih (tramp stamp). Who knows, eh, dear worst-reader.

Very fun movie nevertheless.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Micro Blog v Social Media

Gotta worst-write a bit about Musk-Twitter or is it Twitter-Musk, dear worst-reader. First. I remember when Twitter started. I wracked my brain trying to figure out what the heck it is. To this day I still don’t quite know. But then I joined twitter around 2007. I liked the idear of there being a micro-blog where I could connect headlines to worstwriter dot com. Tried to do the same thing with facebag, don’t you know. But you know what facebag did? That’s right. They completely shutdown–unless you pay, I guess–linking from anything you post on their site to anything outside their site. Of course, that’s not the reason I bagged facebag. Indeed. Bagging facebag quickly became a no brainer once I started receiving odd if not obscure ads and/or friend requests that I couldn’t shut down or control as I saw fit. Then there’s the opining run amok that was split between family pics and what would eventually turn out to be outright political propaganda via the likes of Cambridge Analytica. But this worst-post ain’t about facebag.

I can’t remember exactly when I did but it must have been about two years ago, I erased all my tweets. I suspended all regular tweeting and only tweet a link to my worst-blog if the mood was inciting. That worst-said, I also don’t have twitter on my phone but I do have it on an old 2nd gen iPad Pro that never leaves my living room couch. I only use twitter as a newz or headline source. And, as mentioned above, I have no clue what the real purpose is of social-media other than promoting whole bunches of STUPID around the world. Unfortunately social-media hasn’t found a way to circumvent all that STUPID, which is the reason worst-writer posts all his STUPIDNESS on his own little barely visited worst-blog.

So what’s with Musk buying twitter? I have no idear. Could it simply be: because he can? Or is this really about free speech? All the gibberish about free speech is kinda mind-boggling anyway. I mean. Why is free speech being touted mostly by right-wingers? Could it be because their speech is so unfree? Or do they just prefer FREEDOM TO BE STUPID? Hence, my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant and its right-wing religious joy ride theme park(s) where dinosaurs roamed the earth steered by Jezus. Man o man, dear worst-reader. We know how well things are going with war and climate but did you ever think it would go this well for stupid people? Oh wait. I new it all along. Yeah, baby. Two thumbs up for worst-writer-ism.

The thought occurred to me to do with twitter what I did with facebag once I heard that the deal was done. But then I thought: hol up a sec. Worst-writer has said a thing or three about Musk in the affirmative. Does that mean I would want to have beers with him? No. Would I want to work for him? Again. No. But has he done some amazing things? You betcha he has. Are his doings worthy of praise as a free speech advocate? Probably not. For we know, dear worst-reader, that most successful people, who’s success stems out of their own doing, happens inspite of capitalism and not because of capitalism. And I’m sure that’s a worst-thought that may or may not put your cookie crumbs back in order.

The worst-thing is, dear worst-reader, if Musk enables the likes of former prez pee-pee-hair to get back on twitter will I leave it then? Since I never followed former prez cheeto-jezus and never received any whacked-out political propaganda ads from twitter–as was the case with facebag–I got no beef with it. The other worst-thing is–unlike facebag–twitter has always felt like it has something worthwhile to offer in these digital times. Social media or no social whacky media, speech of any kind doesn’t bother me. Reason? I can turn it off just like I’ve done with broadcast TV, radio and cable. The worst-question remaining? Will Musk turn twitter into a cesspool of stupid that I can’t opt-out of unless I bag it? If so, I’m gone, baby.

Oh. And. One last worst-thought on crumbled cookies. I am firm believer in the idear that now more than ever the world needs government to regulate. Did you get that? Yeah. Regulate the heck out companies and not people. With that in worst-mind, people still need to be accountable for their actions–which we know isn’t the case for people driven by moneyed and only moneyed interests. How that’s to be done since Reaganism corrupted the minds-eye? Well. I reckon voters could handle that. If they can over-come all the STUPID. But on that worst-note, I die-gress.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Cringefest On Stupid Mountain

There are too many things these days, dear worst-reader, one can’t un-hear or un-see. The most recent, of course, is the attempt by a few & far between rational people in the state of Gerogia with the aide of the court to label a united mistakes congress-person as an insurrectionist. If these few & far between rational people pull this off, it will mean that said congress-person won’t be eligible to run for public office. Ever! Now ain’t that special. For those not in the know, here’s the section of the Constitution that makes this possible:

No person shall be a Senator or Representative in Congress, or elector of President and Vice-President, or hold any office, civil or military, under the United States, or under any State, who, having previously taken an oath, as a member of Congress, or as an officer of the United States, or as a member of any State legislature, or as an executive or judicial officer of any State, to support the Constitution of the United States, shall have engaged in insurrection or rebellion against the same, or given aid or comfort to the enemies thereof. But Congress may by a vote of two-thirds of each House, remove such disability. -14th Amendment, Section 3 (highlight mine)

Now. If you ask worst-moi. Based solely on the bold text above, how is it that former prez pee-pee-hair was able to run for the highest office where, during his candidacy back 2015-16, he went so far as to ask Russia and Wikileaks for help in getting hold of Hillary’s emails? The moment I heard that, dear worst-reader, I thought: ain’t that something akin to treason–or the like? Is asking a foreign country for help in digging up dirt on a political opponent legal, constitutional? He was asking a foreign country–a hostel foreign country–for help in digging up dirt that Republicans had been spreading around through it’s vast network of conspiracy theorists, right-wing rage-mongers and faux-newz. Ain’t that insurrection? No? Oh. It’s not insurrection because the person asking it represent such a large swath of the population that thinks the same way he does. You know. Thinking in the LAND OF FREE TO BE STUPID where mob-rule should replace democracy. Again. Now ain’t that special.

But let’s not get lost in old spilt pee-pee. Former prez Cheeto-jezus needs spilt pee-pee for his hair. Instead, dear worst-reader, let’s get-on about this current issue where Georgia is trying to save #Americant democracy. Oh. How hard it is to watch this person squirm as she’s asked rational questions about her behaviour just before and during the Jan 6 insurrection. In fact, it’s so hard I can’t say I’ve seen it all. But seeing just bits and pieces of it is enough. Barf. Squirm. Ugh. Am I wrong.

This congress-person from Georgia certainly takes the cake, eh, dear worst-reader. I mean. As the number of bat$hit congress-people rises, so too does the cringe. Still. We have to get informed. Their behaviour has to be laid bare. And when it is all revealed, what do you think’s gonna happen? The thing about former prez cotton-candy piss-hair isn’t so much that he was elected to the highest office but the fact that he’s so friggin stupid and anal and disgusting that no one who votes for him seems to care. But don’t forget. He’s only the symptom and not the sickness. Which means. What will happen to my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant if/when someone just like him makes it up the ladder but is just a tick smarter?

Oh well. It was fun while it lasted, eh, #Americant?

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Rich vs Minion-Rich

What’s up with the rich, dear worst-reader? I mean. Not the rich of the world, of course. We all know what’s going on in parts of the world where really, really nasty rich people (Russia) are angry with slightly less rich people (Ukraine) and thereby feel it’s their right to invade and pillage and rape and and and. With that in worst-mind. Let’s focus today on the rich of my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant–most of whom are not billionaires (as we know with former prez pee-pee-hair). And so. We all know how the rich make their money these days in #Americant. You know. On the backs of others like never before. Hence, of the #Americant so-called rich, who probably should be called minion-rich, for they serve the few & far-between mega-rich (real billionaires), how many of them have made their fortunes on something other than finance trickery, coercion, exploitation or inheritance? So goes the way of capitalism run-amok, eh. But let’s not get too far off worst-subject.

What’s up with the minion-rich? Why are they so nasty? And when they’re nasty, why do they take out all their frustration and anger and bigotry and fascism on the hour-wage-poor? And how bout this worst-question: why the heck do these very well-off minion-rich fly low-cost airlines? I mean. Come on. Even minion-rich can afford a better airline, if not a chartered private jet. Or? But I die-gress.

Today, dear worst-reader, worst-writer provides IMHO about how two minion-rich guys behave while they hitch a ride on a cheap airline. The first is a former faux-newz pseudo-broadcaster aka right-wing nut job who lost his job because he rubbed too many people the wrong way with his ugliness. Most of the people were women, naturally. And now he’s flying on a cheap Airline to Turks & Caicos that happens to include an unwanted three to five hour delay. Again. This guy earned millions and millions of dollars in his career and now he’s scruff-flying to an exotic and über-expensive island in the Caribbean that is delayed and all he can do is yell at the working poor because the same system of fail-upwards corporate-ness that he espoused ain’t working to his approval?

The next minion-rich guy, who, btw, is one of the few that earned his wealth unlike most minion-rich, as noted above, is a former heavy weight boxing champion the likes of which the world will probably never see again. And what does this guy do? Holy krapp, dear worst-reader. He beats the krapp out of a guy that is sitting behind him because the guy is either star-studded and can’t control himself or he thinks he’s gonna make the newz by getting a former heavy weight boxing champ of the world to punch him. Looks like he did just that. But. Again. This begs the worst-question: why are these guys flying on a scruff airline?

WTF.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

The iOS Regime

Can’t update because you made it obsolete. Bitches!

Ok. As you may or may not have worst-read, dear worst-reader, I’m an Apple fanboy. Well. I am until I boot-up my Raspberry Pi and get lost in Linux. #Nomatter. The thing about Apple is, I like MacOS. Is it the best operating system? Don’t know. It is the best of the worst, I’ll give it that. That worst-said. I can’t stand iOS. I mean. I really hate it. How Apple has been able to get away with this sandboxed, top-down, un-intuitive mobile and small device operating system, shouldn’t surprise me–but it does. Of course. It was always Steve Jobs intention to lock things down and only make things available via Cupertino central services. iOS does this best. This tyranny harks back to the original Mac days. You know. Jobs literally created a new screw (or something) that required a tool that only Apple had so that no one could open the Mac and fiddle with its insides. You know. Jobs wanted to hinder the whole idear that made the personal computer a hit in the first place. But that was the early to mid 80s. Flash to now and worst-writer has to beg the question: have things changed?

The only reason I own an iPhone is because it does three things. First. It’s a phone. We all (kinda) need a phone, right. Second it’s a great audio/podcast device when I walk Beckett, the killer pug. And third? It’s a pretty good mobile internet device. Now. I know. I know. It has a great camera on it and if you like you can even make movies with it. Heck, you can use it as a recording studio or movie editing platform. Whoopi. But what good is all that tech–if it’s not used? Wow. Ok. I’m getting into real whacky territory here. Moving on.

Why do so many people have so many apps on their iPhones? For. Don’t you know, dear worst-reader. Apps are nothing but silly little programs that connect to the #Interwebnets. The only difference to traditional computers and connecting to the world, isn’t the fact that you can do PC stuff on a phone. No. The reason there’s so much potential on a simple little phone is because the friggin eco-system is owned and controlled and centralised and basta! Oh. And let’s not forget. There’s no way out–once you’re in. Hence I prefer MacOS for any productivity or work (and I’m seriously considering dumping it all for linux–but that’s a whole ‘nother worst-post). Put another worst-way. Apple has finally created another dream device where it owns the key, the tools, the innards, everything. That’s life, eh.

I only have two screens available on my iPhone. In those two screens I have four folders with a few apps in them. The only apps I use on a regular basis are those available from Apple. You know. Podcasting. Mail. Contacts. Etc. Although few & far between, the third-party apps I use include the Covid warning app. AdGuard to block obnoxious advertising when I use Safari. DHL for tracking packages. Etc., etc. My worst-point is, I think I’m pretty frugal when it comes to loading stuff on this device. I’ve never attempted to make a movie. I rarely use the camera and more and more it’s only used for scanning or taking picture of information. My point with this convoluted paragraph is that the iPhone, as smart as it is, is actually kinda stupid. But I die-gress.

Ok. Good. Let’s get to where this worst-post is supposed to be going.

The pic above is a recent screenshot from when I tried to setup Apple’s new Account Recovery Contact. Now. Unfortunately I wasn’t able to set up the service. Reason? That’s right, you guessed it, although my iPhone has the latest iOS update, my beloved stainless steel Apple Watch 2, does not. And so. You want to know how your device is made obsolete? In all my tech years obsoletism has never been out in the open. The people running these companies that make this krapp probably never even talk about it. It just happens. And it’s obviously very convenient for profits. So. In a way. This is a first. WTF. Or maybe not.

Lo and behold the benefits of hand-me-downs.

I have the privilege of being able to use two Apple Watches. Reason? Like all my iOS devices, I don’t buy them, except for the phone and my MacBook. My wife is on her fourth Apple Watch and her third iPad. Unlike me, she needs these things. She needed a new Apple Watch on account the old one’s battery was dying. So she got the Apple Watch 6. Don’t get me started on iPads, but she’s broken so many of those I’ve lost count. (It’s at least three.) Her previous watch, a stainless-steel Apple Watch 2, she reluctantly handed down to me, but has since given up on it because, well, the newer Apple Watch 6 is so much better. She especially likes the fact that it’s waaaaay lighter. After a while I started to fiddle with the Apple Watch 2 and then I took a real liking to it–and not because it’s so much slower than my Apple Watch 3. It’s something about the stainless steel, the weight, the shine, I think. Anywho.

My Apple Watch 3 was also on its last battery legs. As I fiddled with these two watches to see which I like best, I was just gonna sell the other. Then I discovered that iOS lets you use two watches at the same time by enabling something in the watch app on the iPhone. Ok. Cool. The problem is, getting hand-me-down devices also means you get worn-out batteries. Like I said. As I fiddled with them for a few weeks I quickly realised that my battery situation was critical in both watches. Neither watch would get me through a few hours, let alone a full day, without having to charge it. What a pain in the… Anywho.

I really took a liking to the stainless steel watch so I decided to use Apple’s renewal program where I paid the €98 fee, they sent me special packaging, I packaged it, and then sent it in for what I thought would be a simple battery replacement. Turns out they don’t just replace the battery. They sent me a completely new stainless steel Apple Watch 2. This thing cost €800 when my wife bought it, which was right after its introduction. So I was tickled to death thinking, even though €98 for a battery renewal is nothing to laugh at, I got a new friggin watch. But then. About a month or two of full-time use, letting my Apple Watch 3 collect dust, Apple pulls a whammy. Apple made the Apple Watch 2 obsolete. In other words, it doesn’t receive updates anymore. Ok. Fine. As long as the watch works, I don’t care. And it does work. It’s brilliant. In fact, I think it works for two days on one charge. It’s also perfect for telling time, controlling podcasts and music and receiving/answering messages. But then I tried to set up the Apple recovery thingy and bam. Nothing works. Which means, I have a choice. Not only is the Apple Watch 2 obsolete, but I probably have to stop using it because I can’t use the Apple recovery thingy. So the choice is to not use the Apple recovery thingy or… Ok. Great. Not.

My point with this worst-post is 1) we really need some right to repair laws and 2) we also need to regulate the $hit out of corporations that think they’ve earned the privilege and it’s now their right to rip us off. With that in mind. Do I like the Apple Watch? Sure. I do. Would I go out buy one. No. My wife breaks enough of her stuff or uses it long to have to replace it which means I’ve got lots of hand-me-downs to play with. But. This is a friggin watch. Can’t they (Apple) at least put some effort into one product and not make it obsolete? Please.

Rant on.

-T

Things One Can’t Un-Hear-See

Ok, dear worst-reader. It’s me? Right? We all know it’s me. I mean. I read a lot of newz. Can watch and listen to it, too. Every once-a-once something pops out for me and I worst-write about it. Hence my worst-writer category News, where I post my worst humble opinions about all things… newz. Anywho.

There are moments when scanning the newz that really take me for a loop, dear worst-reader. Like the video above. If you go to about the 9:40 mark in the vid, the following is said–and as far as worst-writer is concerned, it’s a doozy:

Meanwhile, over the past decade, a typical American household paid more in taxes than it accumulated in wealth. -Source: see link below.

When I heard that in the vid I immediately hunted for the transcript (link below). I had to read the words that corresponded with the video. To my astonishment, I actually had heard them correctly. And so. Again. It’s me? Right? We all know it’s me. Reason? When I hear krapp like this, I can go through the roof. Why? Well. Don’t worry. It’s not because it’s my problem. Remember. I’m worst-writer, #Americant expatriate, documenting all-things worst. That worst-said. There are moments in this time & space that chronicles the demise of the greatest country ever conceived that just blow my mind. And so. Let’s repeat, shall we.

Meanwhile, over the past decade, a typical American household paid more in taxes than it accumulated in wealth.

It paid those taxes while the richest men in the history of humanity paid the least (taxes). On top of that, #Americants keep voting for politicians that tell them it ain’t (all) so. Go figure.

Way to go #Americant. You deserve…

Rant on.

-T

Links:

A Most Unentertaining Film

Source of pic: see wiki link below

Worst-title 2: How things look while you wait for American Dream death.

Worst-title 3: Pseudo-Review of the documentary Nomadland.

No. Seriously. Dear worst-reader. Nomadland has to be one of the most bizarre if not surreal movies ever. No. Seriously. I’d even compare it to the ending of 2001 Space Odyssey. You know. All the colourful mind-fcuk Stanley Kubrick did with the death (rebirth?) of Bowman. The only difference to Nomadland is that after the first ten or fifteen minutes of it my mind’s eye kept showing me images of worst-writer asking himself in front of a shiny, black monolith:

But. Wait. There’s no story here.

Or is there?

A few hours after watching it I came up with the following mind’s eye explanation for Nomadland. Are you ready? Here it goes.

This is the greatest master degree thesis submission in the history of #Americant university curricula that is Radio, Television & Film.

Does this mean I wouldn’t recommend the film? No. Stream it now, dear worst-reader. It’s actually kinda cool. I mean. It has no point. It has no story. It certainly doesn’t have any sex and violence or comic book value. But it is kinda cool. So what does it do for worst-writer? Ok. You asked for it. Buckle up buttercup.

First. Movies like this usually motivate worst-moi to read the book. You know, artsy-fartsy films. A film about vandwelling in a country like my beloved & missed #Americant, though, doesn’t motivate. Oscar nominations don’t motivate much either. I should add that I didn’t mind waiting for the film to be available via streaming, with or without Covid. So it took me a while, after its release, to get to it.

According to sources (Wiki), the author of the book is an “American author who writes about subcultures”. Ok. That’s fancy, I guess. Then there’s the inclusion of lots of real-life folk in the film. You know. The director only used a few seasoned actors. Which means the other characters weren’t characters at all but instead real people, filmed in their environment, which makes this film a documentary, IMHO. Am I wrong?

One of the biggest questions I have about the film is the director. This film certainly motivates me to watch some of her other work, but I’m not gonna rush out to do it. I will simply tip my worst-hat off to her for putting this subculture in a confused movie that is worth your while, if you like artsy-fartsy films.

Which brings me to McDormand. What a resume she has, eh! Oh, how being married to one of the Coen Brothers can make for great film making. Personally, I think she’s great in Raising Arizona, Burn After Reading and Three Billboards. But her crown jewel has to be Fargo where to this day, after so many years, I can still hear her Dakota accent and those boots crushing through frozen snow in every damn scene. That worst-said, for the life of me I can’t figure out what earns her an Oscar for Nomadland. The film earning an Oscar? Yes. But it’s a documentary. And she won best actress. Repeat: for best acting. In a documentary. Sarcasm off.

The thing that gets to me about this film is the confusion between content and context. Vandwelling is nothing new in my beloved & missed #Americant. When I was a kid (in the 1970s) the dream of every working-class stiff in rural bum-fcuk, redneck, white-trash #Americant, was going on a cruise or owning an RV. Heck, those who were able to manage the purchase, also managed to make an already ugly neighbourhood uglier with noodles and oodles of these massive car-houses on wheels parked in yards, on account they didn’t fit in driveways, rotting like everything else. Ah. The spoils of consume-to-survive post WW2 #Americant, eh. That RV living was replaced with van living only means that all those damn hippies in their VW Busses I guess did leave an impression (on society). Moving on.

Obviously an RV is different from living in a van–until one considers the ramification of Reaganism, which, ironically, according to worst-writer, the same cruise ship, RV, VW Bus people enabled and facilitated and thereby turned their nomadic dreams into the/a downtrodden van nightmare. Which brings me to the only scene in this film that stands out for having any dramatic, redeeming value.

While McDormand’s character is borrowing money from family to fix her broken substitute home (van=poor man’s RV), there is a conversation about real-estate. McDormand sits idly by while others discuss the potential of #Americant’s last hope to make money in the crooked and misaligned economy that is the before and aftermath of the great (2008) depression-recession. You know. The buying and selling of real-estate which always requires someone else’s money. During this conversation McDormand blurts out a question that goes something like this:

Why would you buying something that you can never own?

Good question, eh, dear worst-reader. The question is especially good when you consider this film is based on a book written by someone who specialises in subculture and it was directed by Chloé Zhao who is from China and has a not so uninteresting family. I mean. Remember the context here. This is a film slash documentary about #Americant and how it has fallen prey to the whims of having elected morons and greed mongers as political and economic leaders. Of course, being nomadic has nothing to do with being forced into poverty because you’re a fcuking idiot and you spend your entire life chasing after candy that’s being held in front of you by moneyed and political ideological interests. Candy that has never held a grain of truth. Come and get some, baby. Come and get some.

The thing this film fails-upwards at is replacing the obvious (poverty) with new-fangled imagery (nomads). Perhaps that’s what makes it charming. Yeah. I guess it’s charming to play around with the obviousness of what has given rise to #Americant. Is the obvious better interpreted through the book? Maybe. But. Like I wort-said. I’m not interested in reading it. I grew up in and around the subject matter tackled here. The problem worst-writer has with this film is its portrayal of generational wanton political and social ignorance and ineptitude that is well hidden, disguised, avoided. Instead. Everyone in this film wears that new-fangled #Americant symbol that has replaced the stars & stripes, the bald eagle, Rosie the Riveter. That new symbol is nothing less than the smiley-face. You know. That non-dimensional figure that has the for-ever forced human expression of having to cope with meaninglessness galore and never understanding how or why. Or something like that.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Database Going Postal

It all started for worst-writer, dear worst-reader, with the nomenclature: going postal. The thing is, as I was slowly but surely beginning my expat journey around 1987, which was finalised in 1989, mass shootings or workplace rage in my beloved & missed united mistakes of #Americant, were rampant. It wasn’t as bad as it is now, but it was newer back then. That means, there was no definition of a mass shooting. Then Columbine happened and everything changed. At least worst-writer thought it did. The thing is, Columbine wasn’t even the worst mass shooting up to that point. I vaguely remember there being a few other shootings where more people were killed before Columbine. It all, eventually, could be looked up on the #interwebnets but sometimes the info was a bit convoluted, if not hard to find. Until now.

If you do an #internetwebnet search lots of lists of mass shootings are to be found. But they are all in their own world. Perhaps that has something to do with having defined what a mass shooting is according to certain criteria. Currently a mass shooting is defined by the killing of four or more persons, according to the FBI. Which is fine and dandy. What should be more obvious, though, is how to prevent mass shootings. Who knew, eh?

MotherJones has put together a dandy little database of mass shootings that should soothe the heart of anyone interested in understanding #Americant’s lust for violence, authoritarianism and dollar worship. You know. That country in the western hemisphere that just loves killing itself because it can’t understand sex, history, the concept of fiat money or what was the point of the Oscar winning movie Nomadland in 2021. Wow. I need to worst-write something about that movie soon. It’s left something of a sour grape in the left cavity of my nose. Or have I already written something about it? Wait. I don’t remember. Hey #interwebnet search machine… search worstwriter dot com for…

#Nomatter.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

United Mistakes Of Police

Source of pic: see wiki link below.

Wrap your head around it, dear worst-reader. A traffic stop. A traffic stop can kill you. WTF.

What is a traffic stop? I’ve been involved in several. You know. Back in the day before I expatriated. Wow. What times those were. Thank goodness I don’t live in a country anymore that does traffic stops like #Americant does traffic stops. Good for me, eh. We’re worst-writing about forty years ago, don’t you know. Forty years ago I experienced traffic stops a whole bunch. So what is it about traffic stops that make them so unique, if not mind boggling? Oh yeah. They can kill you.

The police in my beloved & missed #Americant would flash their red lights and pull me over to the side of the road or highway. Remember that scene from the movie Thelma & Louise? They’re driving in the middle of nowhere, perhaps death valley, and out of the blue a policeman pulls them over. Thelma watches the policeman get out of his vehicle and walk towards them and she says: “Oh god. He’s a nazi”. Or something like that. Yeah. It’s just like that. The police get out of their vehicles and walk over to you as though they are the arm and fingers of a blind and ignorant state of sanctioned vengence.

After pulling me over and informing me about my infraction, the policeman would go about his bidness of collecting both subjugation and finances for the state. You know. He gave me a ticket. For. Indeed. I often felt the love of belligerence every time a cop pulled me over. Jeezus-h-xrist, I would think. Who in their right mind would make up a system like this? And so. As it goes. The majority of law enforcement in the united mistakes of #Aemricant isn’t about crime or murder or stopping husbands from killing wives. No. It’s about ten miles an hour over the speed limit that includes a fine and mark on your driving record and whole host of bureaucratic bull$hit that can be never ending. Indeed. Where would state and local government be without traffic stops? And that’s not all, dear worst-reader. But before I get to that…

Once I got pulled over twice within a month where I exceeded the speed limit each time by twenty miles per hour. Yeah. I was in a hurry. That fiasco ended up costing me a silly hour-wage job on account I had to turn-in my driver’s license for three friggin’ months. After it was all done it cost me two-hundred and fifty dollars, which is a lot of money for college student white-trash back then. For. Don’t you know, dear worst-reader. Those two sequential tickets put a special mark on my driving record. I subsequently received notice by mail that I was to appear before a local sheriff. Which I did. Then the sheriff took my license away and seemed to enjoy doing it. And don’t get me wrong. He was/is king of the hill. He could have taken a lot more away from me if he could, I’m sure. Or?

I broke the law by speeding in the middle of the day on a rural highway where there was no traffic, barely any cars, and even the concept of pedestrian was null and void–but there were a lot of fields and pastures and forests on either side of those highways and there were lots of grazing (and implanted) buffalo or sellers of local cantaloupe and, of course, cops that would hide in their cop-cars behind billboards waiting for guys like me–just like in the movies. And so. Question a cops motivation for the necessity of outrageous fines and other punitive measures because someone speeds here or there for a few minutes and… Yeah. I learned real quick as a privileged young white-trash guy in white-trash #Americant how to subject myself to the coercive game of state and local authority. That means. I grew up in a world that is beyond anything anywhere else I’ve lived–when it comes to the punitive nature of policing. In other worst-words, when it comes to controlling the minions of white-trash, there must first and foremost be control over behaviour. But to be really honest, considering what I read these days about police in my beloved & missed #Americant, my experience was, at best, silly.

Policing is how #Americant does it, dear worst-reader. Policing is the entry and exit, the first and last, both sides of the wall that is a nation-state. The police are everywhere. There are state police, city police, county police, town police, college campus police, federal police, immigration police, mall police, corporate police, tax police, sea police, mountain police, tobacco and firearm police and and and. Police is such an industry that it even gets all the surplus military equipment like armoured vehicles, rifles and pistols, clothing, etc., because the pentagon has too much of it anyway. Heck, most crowd control equipment comes from the military and is gleefully taken by the police. And you know what? Every one of these police, man or woman or man-child, carries a badge, an #Americant attitude that could hard boil eggs in seconds, and they’ve all grown up on/in Hollywood’s portrayal of guns and violence and control and partriarchy and hierarchy and and and. So consider that next time you see a police car with to serve and protect written on it. To serve and protect is code for something else.

When I was harassed by the police–so long ago–it never crossed my mind that my life could end because of it. For worst-moi it was always about the frustration of fines and court appearances and listening to mostly old white men complain about my attitude. Did anything worthwhile ever come from all this state sponsored harassment? Heck yeah. It’s part of my expatriation, baby. But until I expatriated I did my best to not get caught speeding or make sure my car had the proper license plate or I didn’t give a cop the evil eye when he passed by. That worst-said, forty or so years later, look at what has become of policing in #Americant.

Does #Americant policing really need to be like this? I mean. An arm of the government in the form of the police could be something else. What? Should I stop being naive, dear worst-reader? Why must there be so many deaths at the hand of government simply because people, human beings, don’t want to be prodded and poked and controlled like cattle? Ok. Ok. Don’t worry. I’m not gonna get into that defund the police stuff. Then again. The idear of using some of the wealth and power of the police-state to better train all the man-children with badges isn’t a bad thing. Or? Or how bout this? Why not redistribute some police funding in order to properly train all the man-children with guns so they can de-escalate a situation instead of drawing a gun, pointing it at someone’s head and pulling the trigger till it goes bang. Wow. Resisting arrest is a death sentence. Or is the death sentence questioning the authority of the state? Oh my.

Patrick Lyoya had no clue what he was getting into. He probably doesn’t know what it means to be a black man in Michigan who barely speaks the language, which may or may not be the case with other Congolese. Oh yeah. Let’s not forget that he was driving a car with the wrong license plate. Yeah. The death of Patrick Lyoya is commonplace in my beloved & missed united mistakes–and all because of a traffic stop. So what does questioning any of this matter? There’s now another name along side George Floyd. Wow. When is #Americant gonna wake up? Oh. Wait. That’s why it’s #Americant.

Rant on.

-T

Links:

Pseudo-Review: Keychron K2 V2

Worst-title 2: This is one cool keyboard that I didn’t know I needed

Every once-a-once, dear worst-reader, whether in a computer section of a retailer or fiddling around at an Apple Store, I always give keyboards a test. The thing is, as a MacBook user for the past (going on) twenty years, I’ve never really liked the keyboards. And even though there’s been a lot of complaining about the 2015-2017 12” MacBook’s butterly keyboard, I’ve actually taken a liking to it compared to their chiclet keyboards. That worst-said, over the past few years when trying out all these fancy gamer keyboards, which are nothing but copies of keyboards from the IBM PC days (1980s), I couldn’t help but think these things are more for nine1 finger typers. And so. I’m there. I need me some new keyboard.

When my MacBook is in clamshell mode I always use an Apple wireless aluminium keyboard that dates back to 2010. Yeah. In fact. When I bought my 2017 12” Macbook I also took in my trusty albeit broken keyboard hoping they’d repair it. And get this. After I paid for the MacBook, I’m sure, the Apple Store just gave me a new aluminium wireless keyboard. Now. They didn’t give me the newer magic keyboard. Of course not. But they had an actual new-old aluminium keyboard and they didn’t even charge me for it. Ain’t that cool.

New-old keyboards betold

I broke down the other day after visiting with my son who just bought a new gamer keyboard. After I finished fiddling with it–where he always admires his old man’s nine finger typing skills–it didn’t take long before I knew what was to be done. And so. When I got home I started doing some research.

Which of these new, fancy, higher tech copies of 1980s keyboards should I get? Keep in mind. I’ll rarely refer to these things as mechanical keyboards. They are NOT mechanical in the least. If you notice in the pic above, I’m still an avid worst-typewriter. Now that’s where you’ll find mechanics in a keyboard. Moving on.

Long worst-review almost short

I decided for the Keychron K2 version 2 bluetooth and RGB keyboard with the aluminum bezel. Since it was also on sale I kinda new the stars were aligned. As soon as I hit the buy button I continued watching reviews on the youtubes and blogs to see what I’ve gotten myself in. Luckily, unlike many other tech purchases I make, the reviews about this keyboard didn’t make me regret my choice. The only problem? I got a delay message from you-know-who online distributor which meant it took almost a full week for it to arrive. You know, a full week after we pay that annual fee that’s supposed to give us two-day shipping. Sarcasm off.

Brown, Red, Blue

This keyboard is much heavier than I expected. I suppose that has something to do with the aluminium bezel. As far as the design and styling, I like the contrasting grey keys and the orange accentuated ESC and RGB lighting key. I’ve only begun to understand the meaning between red, blue and brown key mechanisms so the jury’s still out on that. I have the brown mechanisms. I think my son’s keyboard is red. If the brown mechanism is supposed to be between the red and blue in loudness and tactile feel, I’m not sorry with my choice. I don’t need anything louder–but a bit more key resistance would be welcome. Then again. Beggars can’t choosey, eh. For whatever reason the red key device was only available in the larger (with number keys) keyboard and was significantly more expensive.

RGB Backlighting

I’ve been worst-typing with it for about three days now and it’s gonna take some getting used to, which should be expected after typing for the past (almost) twenty years with krappy chiclet keyboards. But my first impression is positive. Even though I’m still not quite sure what the RGB backlighting is all about, I’ll probably only use white light when I need it in the evenings. BTW. This is the first external keyboard I’ve owned with backlighting, so that’s cool. I guess I can see the lure of the fancy lighting for young folk. Then again. Keychron does market this little keyboard to gamers, which, even as a non-gamer, doesn’t make much sense with its compactness. Don’t gamers want more room? But I’m just gonna let that sit for a while till I figure out more ins and outs.

Design

I was a little surprised how large and bulky it is compared to my aging Apple keyboard. In fact, directly compared, its size is not insubstantial. It’s at least, I’m guessing, two and a half times higher and, as I already mentioned, it’s waaaaay heavier. When typing intensely on the Apple keyboard I would often have to adjust its position as it moved around with my finger hacking. The Keychron doesn’t move at all. It’s more planted on my desktop and its rigidity makes typing more precise. In fact, I would compare it to how the rigidity of a car or motorcycle chassis (without getting into suspension) determines how well it handles on the road. That’s cool, right.

Bluetooth

One of the issues I was concerned about is bluetooth. Although I’m a bluetooth fan, for as long as bluetooth has been around, I’m kinda surprised that it doesn’t do more. You know. Like polish my toenails or just work. Luckily I’ve had no issues, except one. The keyboard immediately connected to my Mac and I guess it’s polishing its toenails. What more could you ask for, right. There is a lag between the keyboard waking up (after sleep mode) and then reconnecting. This takes a few seconds–where the Mac keyboard had zero lag. The good news is, once the keyboard wakes up, the number 1, 2 or 3 key lights up in blue. This lets you know which of three bluetooth devices is connected. Yeah. That’s worth a few second wait.

Macintosh & Linux

Obviously I bought the Mac version of this keyboard. It has a sliding button on the left side that allows you to switch to Windows. It also includes a bunch of spare keys to replace the Mac keys. What would have been really cool is having spare keys for Linux. I think Keychron is working on that. As of the writing of this worst-review, and I’ve not yet connected it, but I also use a Raspberry Pi 4 (see pic above) for $hits & giggles. I’m looking forward to just hitting a button and connecting to my Pi. Previously, I would have to disconnect my Mac keyboard and then reconnect it to the Pi. Had to do the same thing when reconnecting to my Mac. Yeah. That was no fun. Oh. And before I forget. This Keychron K2 has a few more keys than the Apple keyboard. I can now finally enjoy using the page-up, page-down, home and end keys. Heck. It even has a dedicated del (delete) key. Do you have any idear, dear worst-reader, how long it might take me to get used to NOT using the option back-space key for delete, i.e. the standard key combination I’ve been using on the Mac keyboard layout for all these years?

Worst-review conclusion

Is this keyboard a keeper? Yea. I guess it is. Well. I think it is as long as the battery life lasts, the keys don’t corrode and it doesn’t stop cleaning my toenails. At the least, if it fails or I find fault in it, I will most likely upgrade to another Keychron. I’m sold on these new fangled keyboards, that’s for sure. Is it worth the price I paid considering what a new Apple magic keyboard costs? A new Apple magic keyboard is but another chiclet keyboard, and it costs quite a bit more. Since the wireless/bluetooth seems to work reliably and the key feel is a pleasure to type on and and and… It has a delete key!

All in all, let’s see how it goes.

Even if I don’t end up keeping this keyboard, I don’t think I’ll give up on Keychron. The K2 V2 is already an out-of-date model (hence the sale price) and what I’ve seen of newer models there’s been a whole lot of improvement. I’m sold.

Rant on.

-T


  1. Nine finger typers are those who learned to type with every finger except the left thumb. ↩︎