That Day Great White Apes Unlearned A$$ Whipping And Replaced It With Learned A$$ Kissing–Plus My Translation of Rammstein’s Bück Dich

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Wake up, dear worst-reader. I’ve got some worst-newz for ya. Did you know that there was one of the worst outbreaks of hepatitis-a in the greatest country in the universe last year? Whaaaaa? Repeat: hepatitis-a broke out in southern California! You didn’t know that? Did you not know it because, well, you’re one of the automatons that actually directly contributed to there being such an outbreak? The problems of the world today is mostly due to the passive yet indirect contributory activity of the automaton masses. Even though that mass has been systematically culled over the past two or three decades. Perhaps that’s the reason automatons are so damn nasty these days. And by-the-buy, did you also know that hepatitis-a is one of the easiest diseases to prevent? That’s right, all you gotta do is clean up after yourself and make sure everything else is clean around you. And when I worst-write about clean I’m not talking about clean sneakers or picking up after yourself when you finish your fast-food. I reckon in the land of the free-to-be-stupid taking cleanliness to higher levels–and keeping them there–is asking for a bit much. Of course, my beloved #americant isn’t alone among the so-called first world nations that’s having trouble getting rid of the one thing humanity knows how to make without exploiting others to do it. Even though the two situations I’m referencing here (links below) are quite different, one thing remains the same. You can trace the automaton worship of greed as being the point of entry to the poverty of the soul we all live for now. And the fact that the poor–I’m worst writing about the real poor here–the people that can’t even afford to wipe their a$$es–are soon gonna join the zombies (automatons) as the fastest growing population segment–without proper sanitation and/or sewage. Indeed. Until then, not only do automatons need a place to $hit in the filthy and dilapidated office buildings but the wannabe automatons who couldn’t make it (yes, I’m pretty much one of the later) are leading the way of having to $hit in the streets again (but I’m not quite there yet). Wow. Not unlike feudalism from the good old days, eh?

For what ever strange reason, worst-writing about all this unnecessary poverty in this world got me thinking about Rammstein. I mean, of course, the band and not the rundown town in southwestern Germany. There’s always been something about the song Bück Dich that has bothered me over the years. I remember struggling with the text when I first heard it. Words like Antlitz and Passgang drove me to the brink of coping with having learned this gross language. Yet these words were somehow poetic islands in the sea of wanna-cry devastation that the world has brought upon itself simply because there is so much inherent greed and hate for brothers, sisters and all the freak show inhabitants in-between. Which brings me to this new translation retry of Rammstein’s Bück Dich1:

Bück dich befehl ich dir
(I order you, bend over (and get on all fours))
Wende dein Antlitz ab von mir
(Keep your (facial) expressions to yourself (because of what I’m doing to you)
Dein Gesicht ist mir egal
(Your face doesn’t matter (which is not unlike a whore fcuking her John)
Bück dich
(Get on all fours)

Ein Zweibeiner auf allen Vieren
(Two-Legs is on all fours)
Ich führe ihn spazieren
(I take him for a walk)
Im Passgang den Flur entlang
(Amble along the hallway)
Ich bin enttäuscht
(I’m disappointed)

Jetzt kommt er rückwarts mir entgegen
(Two-Legs passes by me going backwards (but what he really means is that his subject is starting to want it))
Honig bleibt am Strumpfband kleben
(The/my honey sticks to his stockings)
Ich bin enttauscht total enttauscht
(I’m disappointed, really disappointed)

Bück Dich…
Das Gesicht interessiert mich nicht
(Faces don’t interest me)

Der Zweibeiner hat sich gebückt
(Two-Legs bends over)
In ein gutes Licht geruckt
(Finding favour in the light (where I can hone my aim))
Zeig ich ihm was man machen kann
(I show him what a man can do (to another man))
Und ich fang zu weinen an
(Which brings me to tears (of joy or maybe not))

Der Zweifuss stammelt ein Gebet
(Two-Legs screws-up his prayers)
Aus Angst weil es mir schlechter geht
(He is afraid because I’m not pleased (with his performance))
Versucht er tief sich noch zu bücken
(So he tries harder to bend over more)
Tranen laufen hoch den Rucken
(My tears flow up his back)

-end translation-

So I guess, in a way, dear worst-reader, Rammstein has written a homage to humanity and its ability to subject itself to Bück Dick or, putting it in a less Germanic way, bent over and wantonly penetrated so you can have a life where/while someone else can’t. That is, indeed, the only reason you have a life, isn’t it? Because someone else doesn’t? Or are we still on the great white ape thing and how humanity achieved so much coming out of the stone age? But I digress.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links that motivated this post:


  1. Note dear worst-reader: I’m taking extreme liberties with this translation. In fact, I am stretching bigly here in an attempt to capture some essence. For example, although I’m using a simple and direct translation of Bück Dich above, there are other translations that would be just as good, e.g. bend over bitch, bow (as in before me), submit (your ass to me), know your place (in this world or in this corporation), I know your place (in this world or in this corporation and will lead you to it you fcuking simpleton automaton that has never had an original thought). ↩︎

The Bridge To The Cliff Has Already Been Crossed. So How’s The View While Falling Off The Cliff That Has Been Your Life Journey?

orwell big brother

The political payback president stupid owes certain republicans has been trickling in with ferocity lately. By certain republicans, of course, I’m referring to the bat$hit religious nutjobs that got Stupid elected. The best example of this can be seen in #Trump’s appointees. There are also a bunch of bat$hit appellate judges he’s been appointing–some of which have never tried a case in court. The way the State Department is being gutted is another example. The department is being headed by a #Trump appointee that is still a f’n Boy Scout. (Yes, I’m ragging on Boy Scouts.) Through new ideological leadership a bunch of long standing diplomats are either early-retiring or quitting their posts at the US State Department. I don’t know about you, dear worst-reader, but I thought draining the swamp had more to do with elected officials and not a bunch easy-target bureaucrats. And let’s not get too deep into the recent tax break that’s been approved by a bat$hit republican Congress–where the richest #americants are not only being giving the largest government hand-out ever but are also being enabled to hoard what’s left of an already decimated economy that probably can’t recover. And by-the buy, how much do you want to bet that of all the free-money the rich are getting after this tax-break none of it will recirculate back in the country? But all that nonsense is neither here nor there. Reason? I can deal with $tupid politics. Stupid politics can be fixed. But there is one thing in politics that can’t be fixed and it almost passed right be me the other day–if it weren’t for a German article my better half showed to me. Did you get the recent BS about #Trump telling the CDC (Centre for Disease Control) what words to use when publishing official documents, especially budget reports? Get this:

In some instances, the analysts were given alternative phrases. Instead of “science-based” or ­“evidence-based,” the suggested phrase is “CDC bases its recommendations on science in consideration with community standards and wishes,” the person said. -from Wash Post article

Gee, dear worst-reader, who do you think the community standards and wishes is in the quote above? If this doesn’t put creepy crawlers under your skin, than nothing should. This is Orwell newspeak, baby. And it’s being officially dolled out by your electoral college elected officials.

Look what you’ve done #americant.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

-T

Links that motivated this post:

Maybe Put A Label On It Instead Of Enabling A Bimbo To Sing Put A Ring On The Heart Of Suckers Born Every Minute

sucker born every minute
“There is a sucker born every minute” -PT Barnum

How do you regulate consumption? The consumer is the backbone of the greed economy. No wonder we all have back pain, eh. Yet we also live in a system that has found a way to protect the riches of great-great grandparents. Indeed. Long dead stupid white people have inherited their wealth to offspring that are obviously less ingenious. It’s interesting how the careful consideration of wealth can have grave ramification for a society that only knows the power of suckling the teat of a really, really fat motherfcuker. But I digress.

The issue today, dear worst-reader, is how former president Obama takes sides in the debate of what to do with a society over flowing with Stupid. I mean, why else would it even be an issue–this whole fcuking fake newz thing–if there were just a few more smarts in the world? And so, even a pretty smart guy jumps the gun and blames, of course, the wrong thing for the wrong reasons. And so the disinformation show–which is something different than fake newz–goes on.

Btw, if Obama warns us about “irresponsible social media abuse” who is gonna warn us about all the greed abuse that got us to this dystopia place at all? Oh well.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

Link that motivated this post:

Yet Another Example Of Fixing Stupid With Stupider

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That’s right. The red text is from worst-writer.

Disclaimer: The pic above is not an ad. Also, I wish no ill-will to the winery. And in all fairness, the wine wasn’t all that bad (as I eventually did try it–but never drank a glass of it). But I do wish to be critical–on behalf of all humanity that has not allowed itself to be distorted by wilful ignorance.

The pic above, dear worst-reader, is from a recent visit to The Homeland. And that’s where everything starts, doesn’t it? I mean. Come on. A once great nation can now be referred to as The Homeland. If Orwell were to turn in his grave, he also most certainly would be cynically laughing his a$$ off right now. What Aldus Huxley would be doing is whole ‘nother question–so let’s not go there (yet). Instead. Consider The Homeland and what lead to The Homeland for the rest of this worst-post. And now… let’s continue with a blossoming feminine flower that is in a perpetual state of menstruation but eventually finds it way to all-things cognitive.

The wine in the bottle in the pic above is called “Reconciliation”. As bad as the name The Homeland is, Reconciliation can be no worse. Or? When I first saw this bottle and recognised what someone was offering me to drink and what some wine maker decided to call it, I fcuking freaked out. After a few minutes, though, when my steamy, rocket-ship feet once again found solidity with this earth, images and audio of George Carlin and Bill Hicks began to scatter through the innards of my skull. It’s at that moment I turned to the person attempting to serve me.

“I’m not drinking anything from that bottle. Thank you all the same,” I said.

“Why not?”

“Have you lost all since of reality,” I asked my gracious but somewhat politically naive host.

“What do you mean, it’s good wine. I buy it by the case. It was a great catch last summer.”

“My friend…,” I tried to continue but was having trouble pushing my chin upwards in attempt to close-off my dropped jaw.

Here’s the thing, dear worst-reader. There has never been and, perhaps, there should never be Reconciliation. Reason? When a war is won, there is a loser and there is a winner. The dip$hit southern states of the United Mistakes of #americant lost the Civil War. And the cock-sucking traitors didn’t JUST lose. They lost big time. And not only did they lose, but they should have also lost the right to even be part of the United Mistakes. Every fcuking person in the fcuking south should have been put on a ship and sent to Africa where they and their great grand children should spend eternity trying to find forgiveness where forgiveness isn’t deserved. With that in mind, Abraham Lincoln deserves a big… Fcuk You Abe! For letting so many of THEM off the hook.

Considering the (political) state of the US today, I suppose it’s no wonder that a bottle of wine named after a lie can be sold to certain clientele. Obviously, according to worst-writer, this clientele is part of the TV nation, better known as The DumbDown aka The Homeland. Even I–a harbinger of wanton intolerance that began with Ronald Reagan–know that rational thinking can only go so far–and so: a bottle of wine named after a systematically perpetuated lie is at the end of my (tolerance) rope. Obviously, there is a place/need for The DumbDown in a society. But the problem now is that The DumbDown have practically taken over as they serve a higher monetary power. But I digress.

Indeed. Let the Phoenix rise. Let the motherfcuker burn (down).

Rant on.

-T

Men With Combs Not Comb-Overs

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Even when I had hair I never used a comb. For me it was a brush all the way. Is that why I’m baldy now? Nomatter.

Let’s worst-discourse about #emails once again, shall we. It was not long ago when emails were the thang. Or have you forgotten about Hillary’s emails already? So much time, effort and worst-words were used to get Hillary and her emails. In the end, no one got her emails. Instead, we got president über stupid. But I’m not complaining, dear worst-reader. My beloved and missed former federalist compatriots do honestly deserve what they received in the last election. I mean, come on. All these years of republican rule and they still aren’t able to see through the cause of all the damage? (That’s right. All these years of repub rule. Or am I the only one to recognise 1) a presidents only legislation power is the veto and 2) since Reagan, other than a few Dem stints, the congress, i.e. the legislature, has been majority repub.) And since I jumped the $hitshow ship so many years ago, all I can do now is whisper my sympathy for all those dumbed-down back home. And then, maybe, post something that is but yet another wasted opinion. So if you’re curious as to why I do this, well, it goes something like this:

Ha-Ha Ha Ha-Ha Ha Ha-Ha Ha Ha-Ha Ha-Ha Heeeee Hawww.

Seriously. I’m laughing my a$$ off. Considering that #Trump was/is supposed to drain the swamp, it’s no surprise that the exact opposite has taken place. Trump’s doings have done nothing but enhance the swamp and, on top of that, turned all irrational, i.e. non-thinking females (gold diggers?) into ITS-ALL-PINK-ON-THE-INSIDE monsters because, well, and I’m almost sorry to have to say this, their pussies aren’t holly and maybe they should think twice about using it to get what they want out of this suck-a$$ life and thereby giving the rest of the world Trump.  But I digress.

The only good thing that will come of the simple-minded fact that a special government prosecutor has come across thousands upon thousands of emails to help in his quest to bring down president stupid, is that at least a man with a real head of hair will be doing it. With that mind, may real men with great hair and real men without great hair bring down unreal men who fake everything anyways.

Good luck suckers.

Rant on.

Link that motivated this post:

How To Fix Something That Has To Be Broken? #Gerrymandering #NetNeutrality

As a non-chess player, I’m thinking of moves in the future. What moves, you ask, dear worst-reader? Well, I’m thinking of how that $hitkicker politician in Alabama lost his bid to wear a (his) stupid hat in the United Mistakes Senate. You know, dear worst-reader, he wasn’t supposed to lose. And the reason he wasn’t supposed to lose was because stupid white men have done a number on that state’s districts in recent years that favours… You guessed it: stupid white men forevermore. But the $hitkicker lost. Now get this. I know a rocket scientist. During a political discussion I mentioned the problem of gerrymandering to the rock scientist. Guess what the rocket scientist said after hearing that word.

“What’s gerrymandering?”

I swear, dear worst-reader. Not only am I a non-chess player but I’m also not educated. At least I’m not educated like a rocket scientist would be / is. Yet, I’ve known all about gerrymandering since I was a tall grasshopper. By-the-buy, as educated as rocket scientists are–just like most pions and automatons that work in corporations and mix up the concept of behaviour with work–the world now dysfunctions because rocket-scientist-like people rule it. And they don’t even know what gerrymandering is. No wonder you’re fcuked.

Back to future moves.

The problem that all the nitwits and corporate automatons that either directly or indirectly support $shitkickers will have in the future is the task of reversing all the things that have been (politically) done already that supports and enables $hitkickers. Is recent election in Alabama a bright light of hope that perhaps there can be a reversal (of all the $hitkicker political cheating)? Again. According to how the $hitkickers gerrymandered Alabama’s congressional districts, the head $hitkicker should have won. But he didn’t. Thank goodness, eh.

And so. Big round of applause for non $hitkickers in the state of Alabama. You guys pulled off a grand win. Now the only problem is, how to re-redistrict not only Alabama but all of the united mistakes of #americant.

By-the-buy, before you get too confused (if you’re one of them rocket scientist $hitkickers), there is a connection to gerrymandering and what happened with the FCC and its recent repeal of #NetNeutrality. Go figure.

Rant on.

-T

Links that motivated this post: